Have you ever fallen for someone so hard that you started fantasizing about them being your soulmate or the person you are going to get married to? You daydreamed about the years passing by, you looked at that person, and you imagined saying: Uh, there it is, the beginning of my life.
But somehow the universe had other plans for you. It just happened. A small thing, a row, a difference in opinion, a difference in priorities that made you grow apart. You were like two plants sharing the same plot of soil, but you were – past tense.
Moving on is hard. But, it’s better than giving yourself false hope. Realizing that you were not meant for each other with someone can be hard to digest, but it shouldn’t keep you at bay. It shouldn’t cripple your wings; it shouldn’t prevent you from exploring your options.
Moving on from a toxic relationship is hard, but you know that it’s what’s best for you. However, moving on from a healthy relationship in which you and your partner only went your separate ways or grew apart is harder. You know what you had was good and valuable and you lost it. Over trivia. Over ego and pride.
But just because one page of the book is fully written, it doesn’t mean you won’t write another one. New and refreshing, from scratch. You will.
Getting all the pieces back comes slowly, through time. You shouldn’t shut down emotionally and become skeptical. You will find what’s best for you, but only after you stop waiting for it. Only after you lower your guard. Not sooner. Not later.
When you think about it, it makes sense. If life was giving us the things the minute we start longing for them, we would become tremendously spoiled and ungrateful.
Instead of saying that you will never find love again, give yourself time before coming up with such a drastic statement. Yes, take your time to swallow that noodle that makes your voice tremble, that agonizing truth: We were not meant for each other.
Let go. Let go because the universe has a bigger, better plan for you. Because God knows what He’s doing. He makes you lose what you’ve loved so dearly to toughen you up. To prepare you for life. You are not a snowflake, a marigold, a feather, darling, you are winter jasmine–you can bloom even in the coldest and darkest of hours.
There are people we are going to remember forever, people who have marked our lives and taught us what love is. True love. There are also those that teach us a thing or two about life. They teach us about appreciation; they teach us about the transience of time, and they teach us about courage. About faith.
Yes, they teach us to have faith in God and the universe. God’s master plans will unfold right before our very eyes if only we are patient and brave enough to realize that some people’s role in our lives is to spur a change, a transformation.
You will be sullen and mad at life, you will resent God’s plans, and then you will understand why everything is happening the way it’s happening. You will embrace the change, and you will learn to love again. In the process. You will learn to love again while learning to love again–with the first look and the first touch. With the first talk and the first disagreement. It will come naturally.
You will stop comparing everyone to that one person, and you will uncover true freedom. Freedom untangled from comparisons and sorrows over past failed relationships.
Time. Time. Time. Just time. And faith.
Love shared is love multiplied. Oftentimes the love that can make your life more meaningful doesn’t come easily–it comes after you’ve learned how to let go, appreciate things, and trust.