It’s not your fault that you went through so much trauma.
It’s not your fault that you experienced so much pain and sorrow.
What happened to you was something that you couldn’t predict. It wasn’t something you deserved, nor something that you asked for. It was simply an experience that life had in store for you. A lesson that sooner or later you’d had to learn. An obstacle that sooner or later you’d had to overcome.
But it was not your fault. And I want you to remember that. To understand once and for all that even though you did everything to avoid it, it still had to happen. It was something that you had no control over. It was destiny’s work. And you had nothing to do with it. Unfortunately, you were just collateral damage, a casualty, a fallen victim. An innocent, frightened bystander who got sucked into the abyss.
I feel your pain and I know your struggle. I’ve been you. The only thing I have to say to you is this….
Life will always be unpredictable. And you can’t do anything about it. It will hurt you more than once. It will tear your life apart. It will challenge you in ways you could never imagine. It will take away all you hold dear. Stop you from doing what you dream of. Rob you off your hopes. Face you with loss. Change you completely…
And you will have to accept that. And heal yourself.
There won’t be anything left for you to do except lift yourself up, dust yourself off, tend to your wounds and give yourself time to heal. I know you’ll want to run away and hide somewhere until time erases all the trauma from your life and you no longer feel a thing, but that’s not the right way to do it. That’s not the right way to live your life.
And I know I am not the one to tell you what’s right or wrong for you, but I feel I have to do this. Because if I don’t, it will eat me up. The guilt will torture me for the rest of my life. So, please listen. I’ve been there. I’ve been you. I’ve chosen the wrong way. But then again, I’ve also let my mistakes teach me. And that’s how I got here. I don’t know where I’d be today if I decided otherwise. I don’t know if I’d still be me.
Your trauma is not your fault, but your healing is your own responsibility.
Your response to what you’ve been through is what determines the path of your life in the future.
It is now or never.
You can forget what happened, but until you get out of your shell and face those scary thoughts and feelings, you will never ever be free again.
You don’t need to be burdened by your past experiences. You don’t need to live your life with them weighing you down. You don’t need to suffer. You just have to see it as a gift. A part of life that you must go through to grow. Prosper. Thrive. Become a better version of yourself.
Healing yourself is your responsibility. Only you have the power to do so. Sitting and waiting won’t do you any good. It will only prolong your pain.
So, stop pitying yourself. Get up and accept life as it is. We weren’t put here to go through it unscathed. We weren’t born to go through it unscarred. We were always meant to get hurt, get dirty, lose our track, and then find it once again. For in that process, we experience the most important transformations. And that, my dear, is the greatest purpose in life.
Life hurts us and will continue to hurt us in many ways. How we respond to it is what determines whether our traumas become unfortunate tragedies or valuable lessons.