Home Love & Relationships I’m Not Dating The Wrong People, I Just Can’t Understand Modern Romance

I’m Not Dating The Wrong People, I Just Can’t Understand Modern Romance


Every relationship that I’ve been in so far has just disappointed me. The people that I date always do things in a way that I just can’t comprehend and it’s driving me crazy. For so long, I thought that I was just choosing the wrong people, but now I think that there might be an entirely different problem.

I can’t really blame the people that I’ve been with for letting me down. The reality is that I’m not built for this era of dating. I’m not dating the wrong people, I just can’t understand modern romance.

We No Longer Meet People Organically

Call me old-fashioned but I like to meet people out in the real world, not by swiping on my phone. Dating apps have completely changed the game. Because of them, it’s no longer about that initial spark. It’s now about whether we like a selfie that someone posted of themselves.

It may be cliché, but I love the idea of having someone start a conversation with me at a coffee shop or a bookstore. I want to know from the moment that I see them that I want to be in a relationship with them. As well as that, let’s face it, “she swiped right and we fell in love” isn’t the most romantic story you’ll ever tell.

We’re All Living a Lie

If we’re relying on photos on apps to help us choose a potential partner, what’s to stop people from editing those photos to make themselves look better? Most people nowadays can’t even post a picture of themselves without filters and photoshop. I can tell you that I’ve been on my fair share of dates where the person sitting in front of me looked nothing like the person on my phone.

There’s No More Romance and Mystery, It’s All About Sex

Let’s be honest, with the use of dating apps, everyone can find someone to have sex with almost instantly. People now expect to sleep together on the first date too. If you want to do that, go right ahead, but it’s not for me. I would much rather get to know the person a bit more first.

On one of my most recent first dates, we went for drinks and really hit it off. I thought that things were going really well until they asked me to go back to their place afterward. When I said no, they were shocked and assumed it meant that I didn’t like it.

I want to go back to the time where you had to really know someone to sleep with them. There was the excitement of courtship, and even the first kiss was a big step. As it stands now, there’s no mystery, no suspense, no real romance.

Maybe I’m just someone who likes to fantasize about old-fashioned love, but what’s so bad about that? I don’t want to keep choosing people who I can’t see myself ever being with just because times have changed. What I want most, is to find a romance that I can understand.

Do you feel like you’re dating in the wrong era too? Share your experiences with us.

Eva Jackson