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If You Want To Grow, Don’t Date Your Mirror Image – Be With Someone Who Challenges You


It’s really easy to fall for the person who behaves and looks just like you. But, compatibility in a relationship is not just about having a good time with your partner.

Even though sharing common interests and enjoying each other’s company is probably one of the most important factors for a long-lasting and happy relationship, compatibility will always be much more than just plain similarities.

Opposites do attract. It’s not a myth.

In life, it’s more important to find someone who is different from you. A relationship that is based solely on similarities is very likely to stagnate in the long run. But a relationship that moves you, challenges you and pushes you is a relationship that will help you open your wings and fly.

If you want to grow, don’t date your mirror image. Don’t be with a Yes person, someone who constantly validates you, aggress with you, laughs at your jokes, follows you everywhere you go.

Don’t get me wrong. I know that most of us dream to be in a relationship with someone who would understand them and always be there for them.

But, parallels can be exhausting. Yes, they are comforting, and yes, they are warm, but I think we’ve all learned that nothing ever grows inside a comfort zone.

The seeds of growth and self-development are found in our daily challenges.

Sameness won’t open the doors to the unknown, it won’t introduce you to new things, it won’t expose you to the world, it won’t teach you the lessons of life. It will only keep you safe and secure in that pretty little bubble of yours.

So, if you want to grow, reach your greatest potential and explore beyond the limits of the familiar, dare to be with a person who is completely different from you. Someone who will open the gates to the mysterious and help you see the world from a different perspective.

Your ideal partner might not understand your jokes, they might wonder how you can like something they personally dislike.

They might complain about going somewhere with you, they might whine as you persuade them to try something new until they realize that they’ve pushed their personal boundaries for you and released themselves from the chains of comfortability. 

This person will lift you up. Believe me.

They will motivate you to get up when you’re lazy, they will calm you when you’re nervous. Together, you will become better. You’ll strengthen your relationship and you’ll inspire yourselves to reach higher, even though you won’t always align.

In time, you’ll understand that your partner’s flaws are not flaws. And neither are yours. You’ll realize that the things that make you different are actually traits that make you exactly who you are.

The best couples in the world are not ones who are alike! The best ones are those who challenge, offset and finally enhance each other

Stephanie Reeds