There are many couples who would love to have more romance in their lives, but there are so many things standing in the way. Some couples have to juggle work, raising a family, and financial issues among other things, which can impact on the romance in their relationship. Others find it very difficult to afford anything but the bare essentials, which can impact what they can do as a couple.
Many people who want to spice up their physical relationship do so by investing in things such as sensual lifestyle product, but when it comes to the romance in your relationship you need to think of more heartfelt gestures. The good news is that you do not have to spend a fortune on being romantic, as there are plenty of things you can do that are very cheap or completely free – and will mean a lot to your partner. In this article, we will look at some affordable ways in which you can be more romantic.
Some Options to Consider
The good news is that you have plenty of simple yet very effective options open to you if you want to add more romance without breaking the bank. One very simple thing you can do is to simply surprise your partner with a romantic homecooked meal. All you need is the ingredients and some free romantic meal recipes that are available online. You can then rustle up something fabulous and create the perfect setting with candles, romantic music, and a beautifully laid table. You could even consider having your romantic meal on the patio in the nicer weather and have fairy lights to add a little extra magic.
Another very cost-effective romantic gesture is to whisk your partner off for picnic one sunny afternoon. All you need to do is get some simple picnic food together, pack some chilled wine and other drinks, and head off to the beach, park, or other local beauty spot. Of course, it may be that there are no suitable places that are within easy reach, in which case you can have your romantic picnic in your very own garden. This gives you a great chance to enjoy some fresh air, eat delicious and simple food, and enjoy one another’s company as a couple.
If time allows, you could consider taking your partner away for a couple of days so you can enjoy a change of scenery as well as some alone time away from day to day distractions. You don’t have to spend a fortune on doing this – you could even go camping for a couple of days where you can dine under the stars, enjoy adventure and excitement, and take in stunning natural beauty. There are plenty of affordable options for those who are on a budget and being able to get away from the stress of your normal life for a short while can work wonders for both of you.
So, these are just some of the options you can consider if you want to be more romantic, but you are on a budget.
The “right” one… Many of us are still looking to find that person with whom we will spend our life. The one who will be our friend, lover, confidant, our biggest supporter, the one who always motivates us, is kind to us, and loves us with all their heart. The one whose soul is as our soul.
But, what if “the one” never comes? What if you were able to look at your future and see that you won’t find true love ever? What then? What would you do differently in your life? What choices you would make?
Yes, I know that if you are like me, probably that information won’t change anything crucial because your life is not influenced by someone’s presence or absence thereof. The mere idea that I will meet my soulmate and then everything will fall into place didn’t stop me from loving myself and focusing on living my best life. Because I realized that I am already a whole person and I deserve to create the life I want to be living regardless of whether I am with someone or not.
I pay my own bills, I love my job, I have many hobbies and friends, I travel a lot, and I spend my free time learning new things and growing as a person. I put more effort into appreciating the relationships I already have in my life, the ones with my friends and family and I enjoy spending time with them.
I was raised to believe that my goal in life should be finding love, getting married, and having children. But, having broken free from that belief was the ultimate liberation for me. When I stopped being scared of ending up alone, many windows of opportunities opened up for me. I mean, I could live anywhere I want in the world, get the degree I always wanted to have, travel to the places I always wanted to visit and not worry whether my decisions will affect someone else’s life. Because sometimes, love, as wonderful as it is, can hold us back from doing the things we want.
When we stop looking to find the love of our lives, we have all the time in the world to focus on ourselves and become our own loves. We can pamper ourselves, challenge ourselves, and build ourselves up to the best version of ourselves. We can become our own soulmates.
Stop waiting and searching for “the one.” If it’s meant to find them, it will happen. Until then, focus on yourself and live your life freely, confidently, as you are the love of it. Instead of waiting for “the one” – be “the one” for yourself!
We were not right for each other. I know it. But, I still want you to know that you hold a special place in my heart. I want to thank you for all we shared and all the memories. I want to thank you for falling in love with me and being there to catch me when I fell in love with you. I want to thank you for all the laughs we shared. I want to thank you for loving me for who I am and your understanding and support you were giving me every single day. Especially, thank you for always being there for me.
Even though we were very happy together, and even though at some point we were right for each other, our love had an expiration date. And somehow, we both knew we were never going to last.
When we finished our story, I couldn’t help but wonder about all the maybes and what-ifs in our connection. I couldn’t stop my heart from feeling pain. And I also couldn’t understand how two people who were perfect together can’t have their happily ever after. I knew all along that you are not the one I am supposed to spend my life with even though I wanted with every fiber of my being.
I didn’t know then, but I know now that sometimes love is not enough. When it is the real thing, you not only fall in love with the other person, but you also fall in love with yourself. When you are with your destined person, you fall head over heels in love with the person you are with them.
Because, we can love someone, and it can still not be right. We can care about someone so much, and yet they might not be the one. Our relationship might still not be long-lasting. And that’s okay. Because maybe all these relationships and love stories are our steppingstones towards falling more and more in love with ourselves. Maybe they lead us to the right thing where we can find our true happiness.
As for me, I refused to let go of someone who was making me happy and fulfilled because I forgot that I can and I am completely fine on my own. That I can be happy on my own. Because with you, I forgot how to love myself. I didn’t live my truth. I lost my authenticity. That’s why we were not meant to be. And sometimes, we have to let someone go, so as something better can come.
But even though we didn’t last long, I will forever carry you in my heart. Because you have changed my life. You have shaped me in the person I am today and for that, I am forever grateful.
Now I know that true love is finding someone who will let you fall in love with yourself first.
The order of the wedding is one that is meticulously planned, to make the day a fulfilled one. But while planning, three essentials must be present — wedding blessings, wedding prayer and wedding readings. These three items each have their importance to the couple, and you have to get it right. While you can borrow already made ones, there’s also space for leaving your touch, by writing your own.
Whichever choice you make, see our lineup of prayers, readings, and wedding blessing ideas below. If you are the hopelessly romantic type, you’ll also find unique wedding poems for your delight. They are either religious, romantic or traditional to suit your preference!
The Wedding Readings
Wedding blessing readings are sweet and heartfelt words that distill your relationship. Readings are sourced from different materials like the holy book, literature, movies, music and more. They can also be written by you if you intend to personalize it. With this, we’ve rounded up examples of wedding readings. Get inspired, whip out the cute diary from your bride’s box, and put something down.
- Ecclesiastes 4:9-12
Two are better than one,
because they have a good return for their labor:
If either of them falls down,
one can help the other up.
But pity anyone who falls
and has no one to help them up.
Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm.
But how can one keep warm alone?
Though one may be overpowered,
two can defend themselves.
A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.
- By Rumi
May these vows and this marriage be blessed.
May it be like sweet milk,
this marriage, like wine and halvah.
May this marriage offer fruit and shade
like the date palm.
May this marriage be full of laughter,
our every day a day in paradise.
May this marriage be a sign of compassion,
a seal of happiness here and hereafter.
May this marriage have a fair face and good name,
an omen as welcome,
as the moon in a clear blue sky.
I am out of words to describe
how spirit mingles in this marriage.
The Marriage Blessings
Marriage blessings are more-or-less wedding wishes to the couple. The bulk of them is religious and traditional because they are well-grounded for generations. If you’re coming through wedding blessings quotes or texts, see some suggestions here.
- From The Church of England
Blessed are you, O Lord our God,
for you have created joy and gladness,
pleasure and delight, love, peace, and fellowship.
Pour out the abundance of your blessing upon the bride and groom in their new life together.
Let their love for each other be a seal upon their hearts
and a crown upon their heads.
Bless them in their work and in their companionship;
awake and asleep,
in joy and in sorrow,
in life and in death.
Finally, in your mercy, bring them to that banquet
where your saints feast forever in your heavenly home.
We ask this through Jesus Christ your Son, our Lord
who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit,
one God, now and forever. Amen.
- By Dave Willis
May your marriage always bring glory to God, joy to one another and blessings to your family for many generations to come. May love and laughter fill your hearts and your home for all at the days of your lives. May you face every challenge hand-in-hand and side-by-side knowing that with God’s grace, you’ll conquer all obstacles together. May the world be forever a better place because the two of you fell in love. In Jesus’ name, Amen
The Wedding Prayers
Prayer for the wedding ceremony is the blessing of your union. This is very important if you intend to honor your faith and connect it to something spiritual. Wedding prayers are full of positivity and suit any wedding. They aren’t always religious, as you’ll see below.
- By Max Lucado
Would you take these two,
of dust and bone,
Born of flesh, then you,
Would you make them one?
Would you speak again
The words you spoke
When Adam slept
And Eve awoke?
Would you let your wine
Replace our water.
And look with grace
On this son, this daughter?
Oh Lord of Eden
In your majesty
Where there were two.
This is the prayer
We lift to you.
- By Robert Louis Stevenson
Lord, behold our family here assembled.
We thank you for this place in which we dwell,
for the love that unites us,
for the peace accorded us this day,
for the hope with which we expect the morrow,
for the health, the work, the food,
and the bright skies that make our lives delightful;
for our friends in all parts of the earth.
Wedding blessings, prayers, and readings have been given in this post. Borrow or use them as templates for your wedding.
Going on a first date can be a nerve-wracking experience, especially if you’re not sure what the first words out of your mouth are going to be. Unfortunately, the longer you think about what you’re going to do next, the more awkward the situation can become. On the other hand, not saying much at all isn’t a good move, either.
Sometimes, it isn’t what you say or do, it’s how you approach the date in terms of appearance and demeanor that matter the most when it comes to positioning yourself to break the ice. If you can set the tone and create a positive initial impression through visual and social cues, then you don’t have to come up with the coolest or funniest things in the world to say, as you can lean on the preconceived image that you’re already projecting. With that said, here are five effective tips you can use to break the ice more easily on any first date:
1. Wear the Right Footwear and Clothing
While you might be hoping to find someone who “loves you for you” and doesn’t care how you dress, the real world usually doesn’t work like that on a first date. In fact, numerous dating and social surveys have revealed that people base their initial opinions and perceptions of others primarily on their outer appearance, which is mostly influenced by the shoes and clothing you’re wearing and how well-groomed you are. Of course, you’ll probably get a warmer welcome if you’re wearing a brand new pair of Givenchy sneakers than if you were to show up sporting decrepit ice fishing boots from your storage shed – after all, we’re not literally trying to break ice (frozen H2O). Why not check out SSENSE and see what designer pieces catch your eye?
2. Use Fragrances in Your Favor
Science has proven that pheromones and other natural scents are cues that the body uses to attract mates. While you don’t want to go back to the caveman times and utilize your body’s natural stench, you can still leverage the same concept by choosing an appealing cologne or perfume. There have also been social experiments done where people who had neutral or offensive odors were treated worse than people who had an attractive scent. However, be careful not to overdo this tip, as excessive fragrances could nauseate or annoy your date.
3. Don’t Talk Too Much
Your goal is to break the ice a bit, not completely melt it into a boiling lake of awkwardness. Don’t put yourself in the hot seat on purpose with long drawn out lectures. Try to think of breaking the ice like ice fishing: you put a line out there and wait a bit to see how the fish respond – you don’t just keep throwing lines out all willy-nilly. To bring the analogy even further, one properly placed line is all it really takes to put your catch on the hook. In more basic terms, the more you talk, the more likely it is that you’ll say accidentally something stupid or offensive, so try to keep your opening lines and responses short and sweet.
4. Choose the Right Setting
No, we’re not talking about your smartphone settings here. Instead, we’re talking about the environment in which the first date takes place. Naturally, it’s harder to break the ice in some places than it is in others. To build upon the previous analogy, you don’t want your date to take place in a frigid area where breaking the ice will feel like chipping away at Antarctica with an ice pick. Instead, you want to choose a warm and welcoming temperate zone that will ignite a heat wave which softens the ice just enough for you to gently break through it. In general, “warm” places are secluded, serene, peaceful, or entertaining, whereas “cold” places are crowded, hectic, noisy, or boring.
5. Be the First to Open Up or Ask a Question
You don’t want a horde of crickets standing in your way when you’re trying to break open the ice with a shovel. In case you’re socially clueless, “crickets” is the term used to describe that horrible void of silence that happens when neither person can think of something to say or muster up the courage to say it. Thus, the first step to breaking the ice properly should always be to clear the crickets out of the way. Of course, in the real word, you’d probably never encounter a horde of crickets swarming atop an ice sheet, but hey, you get the point – somebody’s got to be the big enough person to open up or start the discourse. You should never feel hesitant during this step because, in all actuality, your date expects you to say something, so don’t let them down.
Be Ready to Answer Questions, But Not Over-Eager
Eventually, after a few dates you can cut loose and not really give too much thought to how you’re answering questions, but for the first date it’s always best to look at it like a job interview – try to sound good without disqualifying yourself. When it comes to answering questions, sometimes less is more. You don’t want to be that person who tells their entire life story when someone asks them what kind of restaurant they want to eat at.
Don’t Take Rejection Personally: It Can Be A Blessing In Disguise To Start Searching For Someone Better
When someone says that you are not the right person for them or that they would want to move forward with their life without you in it you can do a lot of things. You can certainly start crying and yelling or you can try throwing your phone at them.
But don’t. First, because your phone is more valuable than they are at the moment and second because you should respect their decision.
Peacefully accepting that someone had a change of heart is the most grown-up thing you can do. You respect yourself by showing that you understand the decision and you do yourself a favor when you walk away.
You take a deep breath, you smile, and you accept. And then you move forward.
Accepting the things we wish weren’t true is one of the hardest challenges, but it’s better to accept them sooner than later because otherwise, we’ll be wasting our time and energy. False hope has rotten roots and nothing good can come out of it.
I mean, realizing that the person you wanted to spend the rest of your life with didn’t feel that way about you can certainly crush your ego, but you’ll be thankful for that in the future for you’ll learn how not to let your guard down too soon and you’ll learn so much about self-respect, maturity, and individuality.
You will learn a thing or two about self-worth and you’ll put yourself first.
One person’s rejection or approval does not, I repeat, does not define your whole life. Your talents, your personality, your achievements.
You are a special cookie and you’ll find someone who is going to love you for you and you’ll feel it in your gut that they are the right one for you. As humans, we have a way of sensing those things.
If that person decided that you are not right for each other, then you need to stop idealizing the relationship you had with them because obviously, that relationship wasn’t perfect. Far from it.
When you in a relationship some feelings should be mutual. If someone decided to be honest with you and set you free, take that chance to get out of there, slam the door to the past, and seal it.
You may not find love when you’ll be looking for it. It may take months, years, but it’s better to search for that person who will be happy to have you – alone.
Holding grudges never helped anyone because everyone is just trying to find happiness for themselves. So, don’t take rejection personally. You’ve probably rejected someone or something yourself down the road because it wasn’t what you needed at the time.
True, right? Well, you get my point. Now cheer up and make use of what you already have in front of you. The right person for you will pop up when you least expect them and it will feel right.
You cannot force life to happen to you. You cannot force getting a better job, fall in love, or even harder yet, get someone else to fall in love with you.
You cannot force getting more money and going on that trip you’ve been planning for months. But, what you can do is stop stewing alone and take every adventure as it comes your way.
Never underestimate the power of new friendships, parties, theatre plays, mountain hikes, or new hobbies. Those things can lift you up just as much as anything else you daydream about. Because those things broaden your horizons and they make you enjoy your time here on Earth.
Everything will fall into place. Sometimes, when you least expect it, all the missing pieces of the puzzle will fall into place. Effortlessly.
The best thing to do is wait and make good use of the time ahead of you.
You better take your time to discover what is it you want before you lose everything else trying to chase goals imposed by society.
Goals that aren’t necessarily yours. Timing which isn’t necessarily yours and yet you chase it for the sake of fitting in. For the sake of conforming to other people’s expectations and standards.
Live your life the way you want to live it and in case you still haven’t fulfilled all your dreams, don’t stress about it. You are not lagging behind. We all walk down a different road and our life events cannot be synchronized.
I mean, just because every one of your friends is in a relationship, or married, or has children, it doesn’t mean that you have to rush to do those things as well.
We are the happiest when love and success surprise us, take us by storm. When they are unforced and spontaneous. We are the happiest when we do our thing; when we live life until life of another form happens to us.
I know you compare yourself to other people, but that’s not a realistic comparison.
You compare yourself to the image of them. You don’t compare yourself to that actual, ordinary, fallible person, but to their Instagram profile. And I know that you want to stop comparing yourself to others, and I know that’s easier said than done.
But trust me, there is a tremendous difference between people on social media and the people behind it.
We are all fragile. We like to look better, more successful, more in love than we are. It’s all just smoke and mirrors. If you put social media aside for a while, if you look at the people through different lenses you’ll see yourself: with the same insecurities, doubts, dreams, cravings, and plans. Just different timing.
So stop chasing vapor. Focus on what’s already there and trust that you’ll get everything you want and need in life, if only you let loose and let life take its course.
We don’t dictate the order of events, but we do dictate our happiness, our perspective, our mindset. Remember, what you see and what’s real is not always the same.
If you liked this article, share it with other people as well.
Kind people are the most beautiful looking ones. Their kindness shines through them and makes this world a better place.
Here are 7 ways how to be kind to yourself and to others.
1. LET GO OF YOUR BAGGAGE
Your past baggage can hold you back and stop your inner light from shining through. We’ve all experienced hardships and pain, but the important thing is that we heal ourselves and start a new life.
2. STOP WORRYING ABOUT YOUR APPEARANCE
You are beautiful inside and out. After all, physical beauty is faltering, what matters is what we carry inside ourselves. A good and kind soul is the most beautiful thing in the world.
3. KEEP A HEALTHY SELF-IMAGE
Accept your flaws. No one is perfect. Love yourself for who you are. Love your body, your face, your hair, your kind heart, your loving soul!
4. HAVE FUN
Be yourself. Have fun. Go out with your friends. Dance. Have a drink. Go to a movie. Go skiing. Have a good time doing what you love.
5. BE KIND TO YOURSELF
Being good to yourself is essential for your happiness. You can’t have meaningful connections with others if you don’t have a good relationship with yourself. Focus on yourself. Eat healthy. Drink water. Take a vacation. Go on spa weekend. Pamper yourself.
6. STOP OVERTHINKING
Let things unfold naturally. Don’t rush anything. Don’t worry about things that may or may not happen in the future. Overthinking won’t help you. Just have faith, stay calm, and believe in yourself.
7. LISTEN TO YOUR HEART
Your heart is always talking to you. You should have courage to listen to it and follow its advice. Your heart knows what’s best for you.
And when you are in tune with your heart and mind and at peace with yourself, your aura will change and you’ll attract positive and beautiful things into your life.
1. Good morning beautiful.
2. You look so lovely when you are sleeping.
3. I love waking up next to you.
4. I hope your day is as beautiful as you.
5. I had a wonderful time with you last night.
6. You’ll be on my thoughts today.
7. Knowing that you are mine makes me so calm and peaceful.
8. I love lying in bed next to you.
9. I can’t wait to see you.
10. I wish we could stay in bed all day and be lazy.
11. Kick ass at work today.
12. You are always, always on my mind.
13. I love hearing your sleepy voice in the morning.
14. I enjoy having my pillows smell like you.
15. When will I see you again?
16. Your presence feels so good.
17. I just love watching you sleep.
18. I hope you slept well.
19. I can’t wait to see you.
20. I am missing your snuggles.
21. Is it normal that I just woke up and I miss you already?
22. Good morning gorgeous.
23. Have a great day, sunshine.
24. I love being with you.
25. I am so happy with you.
26. You are the most beautiful after you wake up.
27. You are the most beautiful woman I know.
28. Everything is better with you by my side.
19. Every morning is a good one when you are next to me.
30. I will love you.
I am currently writing my first book titled “Inside The Narcissist’s Psyche: His Ability To Make Victims Stay With Him Even Though The Pain They’re Feeling Is Unbearable” If you are interested to take a glimpse at it, follow this link and tell us whether you like the subject so that we can send you a free chapter after we publish it.
Have you ever loved someone and you didn’t know what you should do about it?
Perhaps it was a friend, someone with whom you were romantically involved, or someone completely new in your life and you didn’t know how to express your love to them.
Yes, we all struggle with showing our emotions and be vulnerable. We all fear loving someone and expressing our love to them and realizing that that love is not being reciprocated. It is a fear we all have, the fear of rejection.
I think, first of all, we should all ask ourselves whether we really love the person we have in mind. If we do, then we should give it a chance and say how we feel.
Life’s too short. And regret is worse than rejection. After 10 or 20 years you will regret the chances you didn’t take and the words you didn’t say to people who mattered to you.
Therefore, if someone holds a special place in your heart, make sure they know. If you are afraid of losing someone, that means something. Follow your intuition and your heart, always.
Fight for what you love. It’s the only war worth fighting for. And you deserve to be happy.
Lately, it seems to me as if all my friends suddenly got into relationships. Some out of love, some out of not wanting to be alone, someone because of fear that time is passing them by, and it is time to find someone. Don’t get me wrong, I am happy for them. If a relationship is what it takes for them to be happy, then excellent.
As for me, I am single as a Pringle. And I am perfectly fine with it. Finally, after many, many years of being single, I can sincerely say that I have not been happier with my singleness than I am now.
Yes, I am happy and fulfilled with my life as it is now. I wouldn’t change anything. I am not saying that everything is perfect, but I stopped obsessing over things and expecting from people things I should first give to myself.
I stopped chasing after love because a love that you must chase is not true love. That’s why I stopped looking for it and instead, I decided to live my life in the most beautiful way I know. Love is still the most precious feeling for me, but I decided to stop chasing it and instead, to enjoy my life and live it with an open heart.
There isn’t anything wrong with being single. There isn’t anything wrong with focusing on yourself and taking care of you. Knowing yourself. Accepting yourself.
I stopped looking for love because I want to heal my past wounds first. I want to explore new depths of me and follow my own destiny.
I stopped looking for love because this time, I am letting love find me.
I am opening my heart for the people who are meant to be in my life to enter. I am no longer searching for love because I began living my life without following rules and other people’s opinions about what I am supposed to do with my life.
I am no longer looking for love because I learned how to be whole on my own.
In my solitude, I found happiness. I learned to love myself. I regained my confidence.
Yes, true love is still something I desire to experience, but it is not my priority. Happiness is. Joy is. Health is. Loving life is.
Me, choosing not to focus on love doesn’t mean that I am disappointed in people or that I am scared of getting hurt. No. This decision means I don’t want to have just anyone in order to be in a relationship. I am looking for the real thing. I want to have something deep, meaningful, and long-lasting. I am done with temporary relationships and short-time pleasures.
My heart is open for love, but only the kind of love that is based on trust and respect.
Until that love enters my life, I will continue choosing myself every single day.
Have you ever wondered why women prefer taller men? Of course, the main reason is that they can wear high heels anytime and anywhere, but one study suggested that women who were in a relationship with taller men were actually happier.
Is it true? Can a taller man make a woman happier?
One study from 2017 that included 7850 Indonesian participants said yes – the greater the height difference between the man and the woman is, the happier the woman will be. Of course, income has something to do with it because as it was found, taller people tend to have greater earning potential because they appear to be more confident, trustworthy and capable (3, 5).
Taller men are also seen as more attractive and they are generally more satisfied with their life (4, 6). Also, it is possible that women are genetically predisposed to like taller men because bigger men were better at hunting in ancient times and they want to feel ‘protected’ and ‘safe’ in their arms.
However, on the other hand, every person is different and there isn’t proof that shorter men cannot make women just as happy as taller men, especially if they are also attractive, happy, and successful.
Moreover, one 2010 study found that women don’t feel more valued or attractive when they are approached by a taller man as opposed to a shorter man.
After all, just look at the famous Hollywood couples like Nicole Kidman and Keith Urban, Chrissy Teigen and John Legend, Helen Lasichanh and Pharrell Williams, Behati Prinsloo and Adam Levine, and so on. These ladies seem to be very happy together with their shorter partners.
Finally, you shouldn’t let height determine the future of your relationships. Just go towards those who make you happy.
- Sohn, K. (2016). Does a taller husband make his wife happier?. Personality and Individual Differences, 91, pp.14-21.
- Holmes, S. (2017). 19 Female Celebrities Who’ve Been With Shorter Men. [online] ELLE. Available at: http://www.elle.com/culture/celebrities/g26073/female-celebs-taller-than-boyfriends/ [Accessed 6 Nov. 2017].
- Sohn, K. (2016). Height and happiness in a developing country. Journal of Happiness Studies, 17(1), 1-23. doi:http://dx.doi.org/10.1007/s10902-014-9566-8
- Denny, K. (2017). Are the effects of height on well-being a tall tale? Journal of Happiness Studies, 18(5), 1445-1458. doi:http://dx.doi.org/10.1007/s10902-016-9785-2
- Persico, N., Postlewaite, A., & Silverman, D. (2004). The effect of adolescent experience on labor market outcomes: The case of height. Cambridge: National Bureau of Economic Research, Inc. doi:http://dx.doi.org/10.3386/w10522
- Swami, V., Tran, U. S., Stieger, S., & Voracek, M. (2015). Associations between women’s body image and happiness: Results of the YouBeauty.com body image survey (YBIS). Journal of Happiness Studies, 16(3), 705-718. doi:http://dx.doi.org/10.1007/s10902-014-9530-7
- Ludwig, Y. S., & Pollet, T. V. (2014). When men appear smaller or larger than they really are: Preliminary evidence that women are fooled by size illusions in attractiveness judgment tasks.Anthropological Review, 77(3), 299-329. doi:http://dx.doi.org/10.2478/anre-2014-0023
- Stambush, M. A., & Mattingly, B. A. (2010). When being liked makes us dislike ourselves: Self-rated attractiveness as influenced by an attractive or unattractive other’s romantic interest in the self.North American Journal of Psychology, 12(2), 341-354. Retrieved from https://proxy.library.mcgill.ca/login?url=https://search.proquest.com/docview/325150812?accountid=12339
You should never ever ignore the woman you love because that’s how you’ll lose her. When it comes to matters of love, the thing we women hate the most is being ignored by the person we care about.
And it doesn’t matter how long we’ve been in the relationship. We always, always want you to put effort and show us your love.
I, personally, cannot tell you how many times I’ve seen couples in public ignoring each other. That’s not okay. When you are with your partner, they should be the focus of your attention – not your phone! Now, if there is an emergency I understand. But, scrolling through social media just because when your love is sitting across from you is utter nonsense.
Maybe at first, she will call you out and tell you that it bothers her when you don’t pay any attention to her. And if you don’t listen to her, you will lose her. Why? Because at some point she will stop “begging” for your undivided attention, and she will put her attention on herself. She will realize that she deserves more because she is a worthy and wonderful woman inside and out.
Because when you ignore your woman, you are doing her a favor to experience a life without you and realize that she doesn’t need you. If you don’t return her calls and texts, you are teaching her to not text you as often, and when you accomplish that, you will lose her because she will never again want to waste her time on you.
The more you ignore your woman, the more she accustoms to a life without you. And before you realize what is happening, she is gone.
You may live in the fantasy that it is okay to leave your lady on the back burner because where would she go? You falsely assume that she will always be there for you just because she loves you. Well, I am sorry to destroy your fantasy, but a quality woman knows when enough is enough. She knows her worth and she will not allow you to disrespect her like that and take her for granted.
Because when you ignore her, she is learning that you don’t respect her. That you don’t she is worthy of being taken out to dinner and you talking to her during the evening. And even if you don’t mean those things, she believes them to be true.
No woman should ever feel ignored and unwanted by her significant other.
This woman was with you through everything. That’s why no matter what you have going on in your life, put your phone down and talk to her. Spend time with her. Take her out. Love her. Appreciate her before it’s too late.
Don’t teach her how to live her life without you.
Oh, good old dating days… Good old days of love, affection, physical closeness, real values, and true happiness. How I miss those. How I crave those.
It was different back then. People were happier. Relationships were simpler. Love was more genuine. Life was easier.
I consider myself truly lucky to be a part of the last generation that actually valued love over everything. The generation that had real values. The generation that didn’t need to be validated by anyone. The generation that knew what real love means.
Today, we live in a completely different world. All of those things are in the past now…
Nowadays, people are obsessed with sharing their lives on social media. It is the only thing that brings them joy. Or so it seems. They feel like if they don’t show their partner or share the bits of their relationship on social media, they will be instantly accused of avoiding commitment and hiding their love life. As if Facebook and Instagram were real measures of one’s happiness. It is hilarious.
Just one wrong move in the online world and you can be immediately be charged with not being “the perfect boyfriend/girlfriend”. It doesn’t take much. Just forget to post a photo of your vacation or simply don’t share an anniversary status with the world, and you are done.
I repeat. Done.
Why? Tell me, why do we need to be constantly validated by society?
Isn’t our own validation, our own approval, our own opinion enough?
And if it isn’t, I dare to ask once more. WHY?
You don’t need an online approval of your love life or your life, in general. Social media might be a good place for exchanging information, ideas, and opinions. And that’s it. Nothing more. Social media should not measure the success or the longevity of your relationship. Your partner not posting photos of you on a regular basis or not sharing love posts with you shouldn’t make you doubt them. The only thing that you should care about is their behavior when they are with you.
Your relationship is not a movie for others to see. It is not something that should disclose to the general public. Your intimacy is reserved only for you and your partner. No one else.
And also… What good can come off sharing your entire life on social media when you have no clue what tomorrow might bring? What if you break up? What if one day you wake up and realize that you no longer love that person?
What will you do then? You’ll delete all those posts and photos and pretend like nothing ever happened until the next person comes along, sweeps you off your feet and you start sharing another love story online?
Excuse me, but that’s just sad. Your relationship is not a romantic movie. It is real life. It is happening right here and right now. And it concerns you and your partner. Not your friends. Not your family. And especially not your followers.
So, here’s a wild idea.
What do you say you stop obsessing so much about what your relationship looks online and start focusing on how your relationship looks in real life?
True happiness is found only in togetherness. In respecting, loving, trusting, and cherishing one another. In being there for one another and spending your life in each other’s company. In talking about the things that startle you, sharing your plans, daydreaming, supporting each other’s goals, listening to each other’s opinions, and simply enjoying your life together. In paying attention. In living in the present moment… In valuing and protecting your intimacy.
So, don’t let this society fool you. You don’t need an online approval to be happy in your relationship.
All you need is love.
Last night, it happened again. I couldn’t fall asleep because I was thinking of you. I don’t even know why you are still on my mind. I promised myself that we are over and that I will move on, but somehow, I can’t. I’ve spent so much time looking down at my phone, hoping to see your name on my screen. I was missing you so much that I didn’t realize that I was losing myself in the process and letting myself down.
When I first met you, you were the light in my life. I had so much faith in us and our future together. I never thought we would ever grow distant. But we did. And it was brutal. It was one of the most painful breakups I have ever had even though we were never officially together.
And do you know how difficult it is for me to explain this to someone? How can I tell someone that I am grieving over someone I never even had? I spent many months with you, and when you were not with me, you were in my mind. We were texting and talking constantly. I shared everything with you. But, slowly, it all started to fade away until we stopped seeing each other entirely.
And what pains me the most is the fact that we could have been great together. We could have built something lasting. I believed in us. I believed in you. I fought for us and our connection, but I stopped when I realized that I was fighting alone.
The hurt from losing you is not any less just because we were not in a relationship. I loved you. I was physically, emotionally, and mentally invested in you. I enjoyed spending time with you that I ignored everything you said when you told me you didn’t want a relationship. And perhaps that’s where I made a mistake. Perhaps my hope that one day we will be together screwed me up.
How could I be so dumb? I am here, writing about you, thinking of you, losing sleep at night because of you while you are probably out there, dating and sleeping with someone else. You are with another girl while I am here still hurting while trying to get you out of my head and my heart.
I was looking for forever. I was looking for love and commitment and you involved me in a friend with benefits situation. I knew I didn’t deserve it but still, it was hard to let you go.
Now, a few months passed since we last kissed and held hands. I still talk to you from time to time, just so we make sure we are okay, and I see you around in town sometimes. We hug, we greet, we ask each other cliché questions. Our connection is lost and we both know that. And we are not trying to rekindle the fire that once burnt between us.
I wish you well, of course. But now I know what I want and what I deserve. And I am sorry that I couldn’t get it with you.