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I Am A Strong Woman And Here’s Why It Is So Damn Hard For Me To Find Love

Very often, people falsely thing that strong women don’t want to fall in love and get married to the man of their life. And while it’s true that the majority of these ladies are very independent and happy on their own, that doesn’t mean they are not looking for love.

I think of myself as a strong woman, independent and in touch with her feelings. I have been in a few relationships that were emotionally fulfilling but they all ended suddenly and abruptly, and it was after I decided to get back in touch with myself after a period of losing myself in the relationship.

I don’t know why I get stuck in these patterns, but I believe it all happens because deep down I am conflicted. One part of me wants to find love, while the other part of me doesn’t want to compromise my beliefs, values, and freedom.

Of course, I can’t say that this is true for other strong and independent ladies out there, but my experiences have been depressing. Whenever I meet someone I like, I get overly excited and enthusiastic about the relationship, especially if he gained my respect for his ambition, humility, and his caring but bold nature.

But I always tend to think they are better than they are and that’s my fatal mistake. I always imagine people to be better than they are, and I get disappointed when I see their true colors.

Yes, I understand that we are all imperfect human beings and we should not look for perfection because no one can be, but if someone is not ready to meet me halfway and be an equal partner to me, then why are they pretending to be?

I know that committing to someone and falling in love can be scary, but it is more terrifying for us, strong women, who have their lives together to waste their time and energy on someone who is not ready to be serious.

We are grown-ass women! We are past the point of casual dating. We are looking for the real thing.

I, myself, don’t have the time to get in a relationship with someone who is not ready to live up to his potential and doesn’t want the same things as I do. I want the real deal. I want someone as strong and ambitious as me. I want someone who won’t be scared of their feelings for me. I want someone who will match my intensity and respect my goals. I want someone who will stand beside me and match me on all levels.

Because, what I am fearing is not that I’ll end up alone, but that I’ll end up with the wrong person.

Take All The Time You Need To Heal Your Heart And Feel Like Yourself Again

We, human beings, are not made of stone. We have feelings and oftentimes our feelings get hurt. We all have experienced incredible sadness and we still crumble down and drown in sorrow. But, it’s during those times that we learn how to embrace our emotions.

Be angry. Be sad. Cry. Let your emotions out. They are there to remind you how you shouldn’t be feeling. Your emotions are there to humble you and break your heart so that it can open for new experiences and better things.

I also went through an emotional rollercoaster. The person who I thought loved me broke my heart. I was devastated. I never thought I could move on with my life. I realized that they never cared about me and what they could get from me. I was only a temporary convenience and they never planned on loving me the way I deserve to be loved.

And I think that this realization was what hurt me the most – when I found that I was not what they wanted. And that is okay. Now, I understand that I can’t be good and wanted by everyone I love. I can’t force someone into loving me. I can only control myself and my feelings.

During moments of deep pain and sadness, it is essential to do small things that make you happy. Go out with your friends. Buy yourself something. Book tickets for your next trip. Anything that will make you happy. Moreover, surround yourself with positive people who will make you forget all the pain that is in your heart. People who will make you smile again and show you that life is beautiful. Hold on to those people.

And never, never feel guilty for taking the time you need to heal and make yourself feel okay again. Everyone has a different pace in life and everyone’s healing is different. The only thing that you should remember is to be patient and know that good things come to those who wait.

It’s Your Fault That She Left. Now, Nothing Will Make Her Come Back

How could you let her go? How could you fail to see everything that she was giving to you? How could you not see all the love that she had for you? How could you be blind to all the times she was desperately holding onto you and the relationship fighting with all her might to make it work? How?

According to you, she was desperate. She was suffocating you with all her love and care. “I don’t need another mother”, you said. Her empathic personality has become a problem for you to deal with. It was easier to blame her and dismiss her wonderful personality than having to step up to the plate yourself and be a better man for her.

First, you drained her out of all the positive energy and then you had the audacity to tell her that ‘she is crazy’ and that ‘you can’t recognize her anymore.’

I think I can understand what your problem was. You couldn’t be with a woman who constantly pushed you forward and out of your comfort zone to be a better man. She wanted you to live up to your potential while you were fine living your mediocre life.

Unlike you, she saw the potential. She knew that you two could work it out if you made the effort. She was sure that it was all worth it. You, on the other hand, ceased to make the effort and started looking outside of the relationship for temporary pleasure. Why? Because you weren’t able to handle how ‘serious’ and ‘real’ the relationship started to become. You wanted something easy, something casual, something drama-free.

And while you may be telling yourself that you were always a ‘gentleman’ who did everything that he could to make her happy, you know deep in your heart that this is not true. The only thing you did flawlessly was finding the perfect way to escape from the responsibilities of the relationship and leaving her with questions, insecurities, and heartbreak.

You got her to a point when she was hurting and bleeding while trying to heal you and bandage your wounds from the past. And even though she was doing all that to help you, you were throwing excuses and lies at her until she couldn’t take it anymore.

And no matter how many times you succeeded in bringing her back after tearing her apart, the damage in her heart was still there. And one day, it turned into something you could see for yourself – indifference.

Suddenly, she had so much pain inside of her heart that she had to let it go together with her love for you. 

And it’s your loss, really. You lost a strong woman, a genuine woman who truly loved you and was always there for you. Now she is gone and you will have only yourself to blame because she is never coming back.

I Am Happy With My Single Life And I Stopped Looking For Love. This Time I Am Letting Love Find Me

Lately, it seems to me as if all my friends suddenly got into relationships. Some out of love, some out of not wanting to be alone, someone because of fear that time is passing them by, and it is time to find someone. Don’t get me wrong, I am happy for them. If a relationship is what it takes for them to be happy, then excellent.

As for me, I am single as a Pringle. And I am perfectly fine with it. Finally, after many, many years of being single, I can sincerely say that I have not been happier with my singleness than I am now.

Yes, I am happy and fulfilled with my life as it is now. I wouldn’t change anything. I am not saying that everything is perfect, but I stopped obsessing over things and expecting from people things I should first give to myself.

I stopped chasing after love because a love that you must chase is not true love. That’s why I stopped looking for it and instead, I decided to live my life in the most beautiful way I know. Love is still the most precious feeling for me, but I decided to stop chasing it and instead, to enjoy my life and live it with an open heart.

There isn’t anything wrong with being single. There isn’t anything wrong with focusing on yourself and taking care of you. Knowing yourself. Accepting yourself.

I stopped looking for love because I want to heal my past wounds first. I want to explore new depths of me and follow my own destiny.

I stopped looking for love because this time, I am letting love find me.

I am opening my heart for the people who are meant to be in my life to enter. I am no longer searching for love because I began living my life without following rules and other people’s opinions about what I am supposed to do with my life.

I am no longer looking for love because I learned how to be whole on my own.

In my solitude, I found happiness. I learned to love myself. I regained my confidence.

Yes, true love is still something I desire to experience, but it is not my priority. Happiness is. Joy is. Health is. Loving life is.

Me, choosing not to focus on love doesn’t mean that I am disappointed in people or that I am scared of getting hurt. No. This decision means I don’t want to have just anyone in order to be in a relationship. I am looking for the real thing. I want to have something deep, meaningful, and long-lasting. I am done with temporary relationships and short-time pleasures.

My heart is open for love, but only the kind of love that is based on trust and respect.

Until that love enters my life, I will continue choosing myself every single day.

Being Aware of Date Scammers

Dating, in general, is hard enough already without all the creeps and back alley negotiations going on, so why add all the drama on top of it all? Well basically, because there are weirdos out there that get a thrill and kick out of it without taking into consideration the consequences and negative impact they are making on lives.

What is dating?

It is the stage in life where you are putting yourself out there to meet a person in a social situation and see if you are compatible as humans as well as assess whether there is the prospect of being together intimately in a relationship.

Courtship and courting these days are where the relationship develops and grows and you begin to realize the long-term possibilities with this person. Read about the etymology and history in this link and how behavior patterns have changed and evolved over the years.

Although nowadays it is done in public through social events, occasions and for sure the social media platforms, it can also be built privately within traditions and no intrusions with the exception perhaps to family approval.

Online Dating.

This system of introductions and creating personal connections via the internet has seemed to take over the need for chivalry, long gone are the days where to get someone’s attention you made an effort of flowers, a card or even a serenade under a window sill. Now it’s all emojis and sexting and chatting to a person who might not even be who they claim to be.

Many of these dating apps and websites allege to be legitimate companies with real people looking for a life partner, but so many are being exposed these days for the corrupt and illegal activities they offer, it can be a worry not to get scammed.

Online Dating site scams.

Being wary when it comes to searching online for the love of your life is an understatement, you have to be real and alert. Many victims fall prey to the charms of others and it can seriously damage your life, with some cases being the end of it, take a minute and see what a brave woman who spoke out on being caught, experienced.

The unfortunate issue with this is that the reputable companies and dating sites out there are being roped into it all and getting a bad reputation along with the rest of them. The fake profiles, the false identities, and the illusion of emotions are all copied and cloned in these fake sites and because they seem so similar you doubt yourself into believing it is genuine.

Signs of a Scam Dating site and its Users.

  • Love in a short time. Scam artists will proclaim to have strong feelings for you and even be ‘falling in love’ with you after just a short period, they will ask to have you to themselves and move the conversation to a more private method such as phone and texts, this is a red flag.
  • As you get to ‘know’ them, details will start to not add up. Indicating in the profile they have a degree in a certain subject but when asked they avoid the subject or seem to not remember. Photos that don’t match the description or photos you’ve received, and are brushed off as being taken back in college are a rookie mistake.
  • No Contact Info. You’ve come across an issue, and the website has no contact info, tell-tale sign its fraudulent. Fortunately, some do get caught and publicized which you can educate yourself on here http://www.datingcop.com/yesbackpage-review and see just how they try their tricks and get away with it.
  • Personal issues. A sudden problem has come up with a family member and their money is tied up there, asking if you can help financially in any way should have you packing for the hills.
  • Or lack-there-of for customers including bad reviews will help make your decision not to use them easier and more comfortable, do your research, be thorough and don’t give these con-artists a chance.

      Karma has a funny way of tying the two ends together at the end of the day, these scammers will get what’s due to them, just be safe and happy dating.

How to Find a Good Marriage Counselor That Will Solve All Your Problems

Marriage counseling can make or break your marriage. You cannot go wrong with a marriage counselor. Learn how to find a good marriage counselor here.

They say happy wife, happy life. They also say that the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach.

All cliches aside, divorce rates are high, so everyone in a relationship has to put their ideals aside to work together. A happy and successful marriage only happens when you put your heads and hearts together to make it work.

Knowing how to find a good marriage counselor is the first step. Here are all the ways you can get the best marriage counselor possible.

Find Someone That Has Training and Qualifications

Any marriage counselor should have qualifications that are easy to verify.

You can get advice from anyone, but a marriage counselor should be a licensed and trained therapist. Verify first what college degrees they have and where they received them.

Ask them when they passed their medical boards and how long they have had their counseling license. The longer they have been around giving professional counseling to married couples, the better they will be in a place for you to trust them.

Be Sure That They Have the Ability to Be Impartial

No one wants to feel like they are under attack. Since you are going to a counselor to make your relationship better, it has to be a safe place for both of you.

Don’t choose a therapist that choose one side or the other. Also, don’t choose a counselor that doesn’t put the success of the marriage as the top priority.

Some therapists lean toward helping people figure out if they want a divorce as opposed to the success of the marriage. Divorce should always be on the table for a failed marriage, but an impartial therapist can help you work on the strategies that will actually help to save the relationship.

Look Into Some Different Counseling Styles

Just because marriage counselors are in the same line of work doesn’t mean they go about business the same way. There are all sorts of counseling styles that professionals use.

Psychodynamic counseling, existential therapy, humanistic counseling, interpersonal counseling, mindfulness counseling, and cognitive behavioral therapy are just a few of the styles that you might get.

No school of thought is right or wrong. The thing to think about is which style fits your personality and the relationship.

A different counseling style might also work better based on your relationship goals.

Know What You Need to Get Out of Going to the Marriage Counselor

There are always different reasons for going to the counselor. It’s always a good idea to get therapy, even if you don’t have anything currently wrong that you need to work through. This will teach you how to communicate with each other and will also make it easier to understand one another.

If you do have a major problem that you need to work through, you should state the specific goal. People that are dealing with infidelity or parenting differences should specifically state these issues so that they can start working through the problems one by one.

The better you know yourselves upfront, the better you can move forward as a couple through some solid counseling.

Assess Their Personality and Communication Styles

Therapists are also human beings so don’t just put all of your stock in their medical experience. You still need to find someone that is friendly and easy to talk to.

Energetically, they should put you at ease every time you speak with them. Their personality traits should match both what you and your husband or wife respond to. This way, you can start your sessions at neutral, rather than in the negative because your counselor’s personality already rubs you or the other partner the wrong way.

Use a Counselor That You Can Afford

Make sure that affordability is something that you put as a priority.

Going to the counselor is something that you will have to do once a week at a minimum if you want it to be effective. This is another bill that you will have to add to your living expenses.

If every counseling session costs $50 to $100, you need to be sure that it isn’t an issue for you to swing it. If one or both of you has health insurance that covers counseling, definitely find a therapist that is in your network.

Think About Any Spiritual or Religious Beliefs

The bonding and unity of your marriage is also a spiritual thing. You need to be sure that your counselor matches your spiritual beliefs.

If you both have a strong faith leaning, then perhaps choose a counselor that is also faith-based. If you’re atheist, you wouldn’t want a counselor that can’t see past their own spiritual beliefs.

Make this decision early so you can feel good in your heart about who you are hiring.

Ask About Their Own Personal Relationships

How is your counselor’s relationship?

Don’t feel that this is an intrusive question. You don’t need to pry into their personal business, but it is fair for you to want to know if your counselor currently has a successful marriage.

It doesn’t have to be a dealbreaker for you. But seeing if they are able to apply their expertise in real life can be helpful in choosing a counselor.

How to Find a Good Marriage Counselor

Knowing how to find a good marriage counselor will help your relationship. Choose a counselor to help your marriage before it becomes too late.

Family and relationships are important, so look around at all the content we have to help.

Simple Yet Cute “Good Morning” Texts That Will Melt Her Heart

good morning texts

1. Good morning beautiful.

2. You look so lovely when you are sleeping.

3. I love waking up next to you.

4. I hope your day is as beautiful as you.

5. I had a wonderful time with you last night.

6. You’ll be on my thoughts today.

7. Knowing that you are mine makes me so calm and peaceful.

8. I love lying in bed next to you.

text messages love

9. I can’t wait to see you.

10. I wish we could stay in bed all day and be lazy.

11. Kick ass at work today.

12. You are always, always on my mind.

13. I love hearing your sleepy voice in the morning.

14. I enjoy having my pillows smell like you.

15. When will I see you again?

16. Your presence feels so good.

17. I just love watching you sleep.

18. I hope you slept well.

19. I can’t wait to see you.

text messages

20. I am missing your snuggles.

21. Is it normal that I just woke up and I miss you already?

22. Good morning gorgeous.

23. Have a great day, sunshine.

24. I love being with you.

25. I am so happy with you.

26. You are the most beautiful after you wake up.

27. You are the most beautiful woman I know.

28. Everything is better with you by my side.

19. Every morning is a good one when you are next to me.

30. I will love you.

I am currently writing my first book titled Inside The Narcissist’s Psyche: His Ability To Make Victims Stay With Him Even Though The Pain They’re Feeling Is Unbearable” If you are interested to take a glimpse at it, follow this link and tell us whether you like the subject so that we can send you a  free chapter after we publish it.

A Real Man Treats His Lady The Same Way He Wants Another Man To Treat His Daughter

A Real Man Treats His Lady The Same Way He Wants Another Man To Treat His Daughter

A real man always puts his lady first. He always treats her with love and respect. She is the priority in his life.

Here are some quotes about how real men treat their ladies.

“Being a good husband is like being a good stand-up comic: you need ten years before you can even call yourself a beginner.” –Jerry Seinfeld

“You spend time with your family?” Good. Because a man who doesn’t spend time with his family can never be a real man.” –Don Vito Corleone, The Godfather

“A real man won’t date the most beautiful girl in the world – he’ll date the girl that makes his world beautiful.” – Anonymous

“A real man loves his wife, and places his family as the most important thing in life. Nothing has brought me more peace and content in life than simply being a good husband and father.” –Frank Abagnale

“If you want to be a real human being – a real woman, a real man – you cannot tolerate things which put you to indignation, to outrage. You must stand up. I always say to people, ‘Look around; look at what makes you unhappy, what makes you furious, and then engage yourself in some action.’” – Stephane Hessel

“The real man is one who always finds excuses for others, but never excuses himself.” – Henry Ward Beecher

“You can’t be a real man if you don’t look out for your kids. They need you.” – Bill O’Reilly

“Remember those black-and-white films with Frank Sinatra? Those guys looked like men and they were only 27! Listen to Otis Redding singing ‘Try A Little Tenderness.’ That was a man who understood what a man has to know in the world. Show me a real man now! Where are they?” – Chrissie Hynde

“Having two daughters changed my perspective on a lot of things, and I definitely have a newfound respect for women. And I think I finally became a good and real man when I had a daughter.” – Mark Wahlberg

Do Taller Men Make Women Happier?

Have you ever wondered why women prefer taller men? Of course, the main reason is that they can wear high heels anytime and anywhere, but one study suggested that women who were in a relationship with taller men were actually happier.

Is it true? Can a taller man make a woman happier?

One study from 2017 that included 7850 Indonesian participants said yes – the greater the height difference between the man and the woman is, the happier the woman will be. Of course, income has something to do with it because as it was found, taller people tend to have greater earning potential because they appear to be more confident, trustworthy and capable (3, 5).

Taller men are also seen as more attractive and they are generally more satisfied with their life (4, 6). Also, it is possible that women are genetically predisposed to like taller men because bigger men were better at hunting in ancient times and they want to feel ‘protected’ and ‘safe’ in their arms.

However, on the other hand, every person is different and there isn’t proof that shorter men cannot make women just as happy as taller men, especially if they are also attractive, happy, and successful.

Moreover, one 2010 study found that women don’t feel more valued or attractive when they are approached by a taller man as opposed to a shorter man.

After all, just look at the famous Hollywood couples like Nicole Kidman and Keith Urban, Chrissy Teigen and John Legend, Helen Lasichanh and Pharrell Williams, Behati Prinsloo and Adam Levine, and so on. These ladies seem to be very happy together with their shorter partners.

Finally, you shouldn’t let height determine the future of your relationships. Just go towards those who make you happy.

Sources:

  1. Sohn, K. (2016). Does a taller husband make his wife happier?. Personality and Individual Differences, 91, pp.14-21.
  2. Holmes, S. (2017). 19 Female Celebrities Who’ve Been With Shorter Men. [online] ELLE. Available at: http://www.elle.com/culture/celebrities/g26073/female-celebs-taller-than-boyfriends/ [Accessed 6 Nov. 2017].
  3. Sohn, K. (2016). Height and happiness in a developing country. Journal of Happiness Studies, 17(1), 1-23. doi:http://dx.doi.org/10.1007/s10902-014-9566-8
  4. Denny, K. (2017). Are the effects of height on well-being a tall tale? Journal of Happiness Studies, 18(5), 1445-1458. doi:http://dx.doi.org/10.1007/s10902-016-9785-2
  5. Persico, N., Postlewaite, A., & Silverman, D. (2004). The effect of adolescent experience on labor market outcomes: The case of height. Cambridge: National Bureau of Economic Research, Inc. doi:http://dx.doi.org/10.3386/w10522
  6. Swami, V., Tran, U. S., Stieger, S., & Voracek, M. (2015). Associations between women’s body image and happiness: Results of the YouBeauty.com body image survey (YBIS). Journal of Happiness Studies, 16(3), 705-718. doi:http://dx.doi.org/10.1007/s10902-014-9530-7
  7. Ludwig, Y. S., & Pollet, T. V. (2014). When men appear smaller or larger than they really are: Preliminary evidence that women are fooled by size illusions in attractiveness judgment tasks.Anthropological Review, 77(3), 299-329. doi:http://dx.doi.org/10.2478/anre-2014-0023
  8. Stambush, M. A., & Mattingly, B. A. (2010). When being liked makes us dislike ourselves: Self-rated attractiveness as influenced by an attractive or unattractive other’s romantic interest in the self.North American Journal of Psychology, 12(2), 341-354. Retrieved from https://proxy.library.mcgill.ca/login?url=https://search.proquest.com/docview/325150812?accountid=12339

Remember, Apologies Don’t Mean Anything – Actions Do.

Don’t say you are sorry for treating me badly and then going back to treating me the same way. Your apology doesn’t count if your behavior towards me remains unchanged. It’s empty and meaningless. And it is not a reflection on your maturity, because real maturity comes from recognizing your flaws and correcting them.

I will never feel guilty for walking away from you because you have hurt me. Yes, you apologized and said you regret doing so. But you did it again. And again. And again. You kept hurting me and that is something I won’t allow anymore. Everyone has permission to walk away from someone who continues hurting them.

If someone has my best intentions at heart and really loves me, then they will correct their toxic behavior because they wouldn’t want to see me in pain.

Of course, they won’t be perfect and flawless, but they are going to be willing to work on the things that are harming our relationship. Because there is a great difference between a toxic partner who is unwilling to change and someone who has good intentions and they love you but sometimes make minor unintentional mistakes.

Because there are people who were apologizing to me just because they knew that that’s what I wanted to hear, and they thought it was the easiest way out. Yes, their apology might have been sincere, but it turned out that they only treated me better for a short period of time and they ended up going back to their old ways.

This is a common tactic of emotional manipulators. They act like they are sorry for how they treated you because they want to lure you in their life again. Therefore, they sweet-talk you and give you an illusion that they are changed until you put down your guard and then they go back to being a**holes.

So, be careful when you accept apologies. Only give people second chances if you really believe that they are capable of working on themselves and bettering themselves. Don’t lower your standards and forget about your needs just so that you can have an excuse for keeping someone in your life. Don’t hurt yourself like that.

And remember, apologies don’t mean anything – actions do!

Therefore, don’t feel bad about walking away from someone who is not deserving of your time, love, and energy.

We Outgrow People Who Are Unable To Love Us The Right Way

We Outgrow People Who Are Unable To Love Us The Right Way

The reality is, we outgrow people who are not true and genuine with us. Those who are not honest. Those who say things we want to hear but never take action to prove them. Those who don’t give a damn about our needs and desires because they only care about their own. Those who expect us to accept them the way they are but are busy changing us and shaping us into the people they want us to be.

We outgrow people who don’t respect us and don’t appreciate us. Those who are fine regardless of whether they have us in their lives. Those who make us feel worthless and replaceable.

We Outgrow People Who Are Unable To Love Us The Right Way

We outgrow people who make us beg for their time and attention. People who make us feel like we are not worthy of them. People who put us last on their list of priorities. Those who never have time for us.

Because we reach a point of no return. When we remind ourselves of our worth and what we deserve, we will not be selling short ourselves ever again. We will turn out back to those people and walk away. We won’t be giving them our hearts and energy to someone who takes us for granted.

We are choosing ourselves. We are practicing self-love.

Because we don’t have time for people who don’t invest in us. We outgrow those who treat us as ordinary. Those who keep us around until they find what they are looking for.

We outgrow people who are unable to love us the way we deserve to be loved. Those who don’t contribute to our lives in any way. Those who make us question our self-worth.

We outgrow people who are not scared of losing us because they have never seen our value and they never will.

 

I am currently writing my first book titled Inside The Narcissist’s Psyche: His Ability To Make Victims Stay With Him Even Though The Pain They’re Feeling Is Unbearable” If you are interested to take a glimpse at it, follow this link and tell us whether you like the subject so that we can send you a  free chapter after we publish it.

The Unbearable Pain Of Trying To Forget Someone You Never Even Had

I Am Not Looking For ‘Almost’; I Am Looking For Forever

Last night, it happened again. I couldn’t fall asleep because I was thinking of you. I don’t even know why you are still on my mind. I promised myself that we are over and that I will move on, but somehow, I can’t. I’ve spent so much time looking down at my phone, hoping to see your name on my screen. I was missing you so much that I didn’t realize that I was losing myself in the process and letting myself down.

When I first met you, you were the light in my life. I had so much faith in us and our future together. I never thought we would ever grow distant. But we did. And it was brutal. It was one of the most painful breakups I have ever had even though we were never officially together.

And do you know how difficult it is for me to explain this to someone? How can I tell someone that I am grieving over someone I never even had? I spent many months with you, and when you were not with me, you were in my mind. We were texting and talking constantly. I shared everything with you. But, slowly, it all started to fade away until we stopped seeing each other entirely.

And what pains me the most is the fact that we could have been great together. We could have built something lasting. I believed in us. I believed in you. I fought for us and our connection, but I stopped when I realized that I was fighting alone.

The hurt from losing you is not any less just because we were not in a relationship. I loved you. I was physically, emotionally, and mentally invested in you. I enjoyed spending time with you that I ignored everything you said when you told me you didn’t want a relationship. And perhaps that’s where I made a mistake. Perhaps my hope that one day we will be together screwed me up.

How could I be so dumb? I am here, writing about you, thinking of you, losing sleep at night because of you while you are probably out there, dating and sleeping with someone else. You are with another girl while I am here still hurting while trying to get you out of my head and my heart.

I was looking for forever. I was looking for love and commitment and you involved me in a friend with benefits situation. I knew I didn’t deserve it but still, it was hard to let you go.

Now, a few months passed since we last kissed and held hands. I still talk to you from time to time, just so we make sure we are okay, and I see you around in town sometimes. We hug, we greet, we ask each other cliché questions. Our connection is lost and we both know that. And we are not trying to rekindle the fire that once burnt between us.

I wish you well, of course. But now I know what I want and what I deserve. And I am sorry that I couldn’t get it with you.

A Grown And Mature Woman Won’t Settle For Your Excuses

I’m A Grown Woman And I’m Not Settling For Your Excuses

When a woman realizes she’s made it, and by ‘made it’ I don’t mean achieving some kind of financial gain or professional success, then she is unstoppable.

When she reaches a point in her life when she simply doesn’t care about anyone’s bullshit and she is done playing games and entertaining people who don’t deserve her time – then she is a powerful and unshakeable force.

Her motto in life is simply – “I am a mature woman and I won’t settle for your nonsense.”

She won’t settle for your drama. She is not a fan of constant arguments. She doesn’t like wondering where you are and whether you’ll call. She knows who she is and what she deserves, and she doesn’t deserve to be treated as an option.

She doesn’t want a bigger apartment, a bigger salary, bigger anything. She is satisfied with her life as it is. Because you know, some people want a normal and simple life.

She knows she’s not perfect nor she wants to be. She also doesn’t expect her partner to be perfect. She knows every person is flawed in their own way and she is not there to judge. What she does expect though, is love, empathy, kindness, and compassion.

She is confident in the way she looks and doesn’t need anyone that tries to change her. Yes, she has wrinkles, yes, she has under-eye circles, but she doesn’t need anyone to give her a lesson on skincare.

She also doesn’t need anyone to tell her to exercise and eat healthily. She exercises because it makes her feel good, not because she has some beauty standard to achieve. She is happy in her own body regardless of her weight. And yes, she will eat whole chocolate if she feels like it.

She surrounds herself only with people who truly love and understand her. She doesn’t need any toxic or unkind people in her life.

She loves herself and her life and she won’t allow anyone to toy with her.

2021 Valentine’s Day Ideas To Keep The Romance Alive

Valentine's Day

This year’s Valentine’s Day will be a lot different from previous ones, as lockdown and social distancing restrictions are currently in place in different parts of the world. But despite the fact that most of us are living in a stay-at-home world, people are still looking forward to this day, with a survey showing that 55 percent of couples are still planning to celebrate Valentine’s Day in some way. While things may certainly feel a little different this year, there are plenty of ways to make your significant other feel special while you’re celebrating at home. Here are some Valentine’s Day ideas to keep the romance alive.

Make a blanket fort

Restaurant and movie dates may have been put on hold this year, but that doesn’t mean that you can’t do the same in your home. Celebrate your love in a meaningful way by putting a new spin on dinner and a movie. First, build a place for your Valentine’s Day date by setting up an outdoor home cinema or making a blanket fort in your living room.  Make it extra comfy and cozy by placing cushions and pillows on the floor, then decorate with fairy lights to enhance the romantic vibe of your fort. For your date, feast on some comfort food such as chicken pot pie, beef steak pie, cheesy fries, or beef stroganoff; then later, watch a movie on your laptop or tablet while snuggling under a blanket. Don’t forget to give your loved one a present – jewelry is always a sure hit, but don’t underestimate the power of a handwritten love letter and some chocolates to make your significant other’s heart flutter. 

Watch a livestream concert

If you and your loved one are music fans and you’re itching to hear some live music on Valentine’s Day, you’re in luck. Some of the most popular artists and singers have announced that they will have a virtual concert on February 14, so make sure to get your ticket online to have special access to these performances. Among those who will have a livestream concert on Valentine’s Day are Josh Groban, Air Supply, Dave Koz and Brian McKnight, Jim Brickman, and O-Town. Once you’ve secured your ticket, prepare a few snacks and a bottle of wine for the concert, and don’t hesitate to sing along to make your date even more fun.

Have breakfast in bed

Change things up by having your Valentine’s date in the morning. Prepare a decadent breakfast in bed by making delicious treats such as heart-shaped pancakes or waffles, quiche, a meat and vegetable frittata, and freshly baked bread. Serve the food on a sturdy tray, and don’t forget to have coffee, a smoothie, or mimosas to make your breakfast even more indulgent. Play some soft jazz music in the background during your breakfast date, and give your loved one some fresh flowers to start your day on a romantic note.

Valentine’s Day doesn’t have to be any less romantic just because we’re spending more time at home. Consider these ideas to surprise your significant other and make them feel special. 

You Don’t Need An Online Approval To Be Happy In Your Relationship

Oh, good old dating days… Good old days of love, affection, physical closeness, real values, and true happiness. How I miss those. How I crave those.

It was different back then. People were happier. Relationships were simpler. Love was more genuine. Life was easier.

I consider myself truly lucky to be a part of the last generation that actually valued love over everything. The generation that had real values. The generation that didn’t need to be validated by anyone. The generation that knew what real love means.

Today, we live in a completely different world. All of those things are in the past now…

Nowadays, people are obsessed with sharing their lives on social media. It is the only thing that brings them joy. Or so it seems.  They feel like if they don’t show their partner or share the bits of their relationship on social media, they will be instantly accused of avoiding commitment and hiding their love life. As if Facebook and Instagram were real measures of one’s happiness. It is hilarious.

Just one wrong move in the online world and you can be immediately be charged with not being “the perfect boyfriend/girlfriend”. It doesn’t take much. Just forget to post a photo of your vacation or simply don’t share an anniversary status with the world, and you are done.

I repeat. Done.

Why? Tell me, why do we need to be constantly validated by society?

Isn’t our own validation, our own approval, our own opinion enough?

And if it isn’t, I dare to ask once more. WHY?

You don’t need an online approval of your love life or your life, in general. Social media might be a good place for exchanging information, ideas, and opinions. And that’s it. Nothing more. Social media should not measure the success or the longevity of your relationship. Your partner not posting photos of you on a regular basis or not sharing love posts with you shouldn’t make you doubt them. The only thing that you should care about is their behavior when they are with you.

Your relationship is not a movie for others to see. It is not something that should disclose to the general public. Your intimacy is reserved only for you and your partner. No one else.

And also… What good can come off sharing your entire life on social media when you have no clue what tomorrow might bring? What if you break up? What if one day you wake up and realize that you no longer love that person?

What will you do then? You’ll delete all those posts and photos and pretend like nothing ever happened until the next person comes along, sweeps you off your feet and you start sharing another love story online?

Excuse me, but that’s just sad. Your relationship is not a romantic movie. It is real life. It is happening right here and right now. And it concerns you and your partner. Not your friends. Not your family. And especially not your followers.

So, here’s a wild idea.

What do you say you stop obsessing so much about what your relationship looks online and start focusing on how your relationship looks in real life?

True happiness is found only in togetherness. In respecting, loving, trusting, and cherishing one another.  In being there for one another and spending your life in each other’s company. In talking about the things that startle you, sharing your plans, daydreaming, supporting each other’s goals, listening to each other’s opinions, and simply enjoying your life together. In paying attention. In living in the present moment… In valuing and protecting your intimacy.

So, don’t let this society fool you. You don’t need an online approval to be happy in your relationship.

All you need is love.