Ladies, here’s the cold harsh truth that no one likes to hear:
A man who loves you won’t hesitate to commit to you. In fact, he’ll be eager to call you ‘his girlfriend’ because he cannot imagine losing you to another guy.
The only way you can tell whether someone is serious about you is whether you are with him, right here, right now.
Because the man who wants to build a future with you won’t make you wait. He won’t make you second-guess about where the relationship is headed. He will be always honest with you about his intentions and you’ll see his good intentions in his actions.
I know that this is a hard pill to swallow, but if you want a serious relationship you should dump the man who strings you along ASAP. Because he will only waste your time.
He will tell you everything you want to hear to lure you in, weave you through a mountain of excuses and false promises, dangling the carrot of change in your face, only to leave you lost and forever wondering whether you should hold on a little longer, or just give up completely and let him go.
And the problem is not that you are unable to recognize a bad relationship when you are in one.
The problem is that you tend to look only for the “good” signs that you two are meant to be together which more often than not are only a product of your imagination.
Because people who know are in a relationship with the person they are meant to be, they don’t question themselves. They don’t look for signs that the person next to them loves them. They don’t list reasons as to why they should wait a little longer.
They just are in love. And together.
This is a brutal thing to accept but it is only brutal when you don’t realize that the thing you are gambling with is your time. Something that you can never have back.
You need to understand that a man who is in love with you will be afraid of nothing more than losing you.
He would put in the effort and work to make the relationship happen. That’s what love does to a person. It rearranges their reality to make space for their loved one.
And if you are with someone who gives you excuses as to why he cannot commit to you right now, leaving him is the best thing you can do. Why? Because if he was really serious about you, your decision to leave will smack him awake and realize that he must do something before he loses you. Or, it will show you how unbothered he is to let you go.
Yes, relationships are complex, but this is straightforward – the person who wants to be with you will be with you.
Simple as that.