You think you’d know if you were in a toxic relationship, right?
It’s too obvious to not be aware of it. Or maybe not?
Just recently I talked to a friend I haven’t seen in a very long time.
She got into a serious relationship and she disappeared. But, considering that she’s the type of person who falls in love and forgets about anyone and anything else, I figured she’s having the time of her life and she couldn’t be bothered with anyone else than her loving partner.
What no one knew was the fact that she was knee deep in trouble. She came across a very harmful person, but unfortunately, she was the last one to understand that. She wasn’t even aware of his manipulation. By justifying his behavior and convincing herself that “It’s just the way he is”, she subconsciously forced herself to accept a life of manipulation.
It’s time to wake up. Relationship abuse is real. It might be subtle, but it’s dangerous.
So, to all of you who feel that something is wrong, but aren’t sure if you could label it as an abuse, here are 7 sure indicators that your relationship is toxic.
Does your partner do any of these things?
1. DEPRIVES YOU OF YOUR FREEDOM
Toxic partners are controlling and abusive. They believe they have the right to choose for their significant others. What starts as an innocent laugh about choosing their outfit for the night quickly turns into a relationship from hell when they actually pick the friends you are allowed to hang out.
If you notice this behavior in your partner, act quickly and leave before it’s too late.
2. CRITICIZES YOU
Abusers are also very demeaning. Putting others down it’s the quickest way for them to rise to the top.
Every idea, every belief, every opinion, every feeling you share is “immature” and “stupid” to them.
If you find yourself second-guessing your choices every time you’re around them, you should probably rethink where your relationship is going and who’s really the person you gave your heart to.
3. BEHAVES UNPREDICTABLE AND EXPLOSIVE
Believe me. You won’t see it coming.
One minute they can be kind and quiet and next second they can turn into the most dangerous monsters who’ll do anything in their power to destroy your sense of self.
4. PUTS THE BLAME ON YOU
Toxic partners rarely take responsibility for their behavior. The first person they’ll put the blame on will always be you. Even when they’re acting inconsiderate, selfish and impulsive without any real reason, you’ll be the one who’ll be responsible for making them angry.
5. USES THE “SILENT TREATMENT” TO INTIMIDATE AND DISCIPLINE YOU
The silent treatment is one of their favorite weapons against you. When your partner shuts down and punishes you with silence, your hands are practically tied. You’re not even sure what happened to them, let alone what you should do to make things right.
If you notice these suspicious changes in their behavior, don’t be afraid to confront them. Don’t keep quiet. The more you accept the current tense situation the more powerful they become.
6. LIMITS YOUR ACCESS TO YOUR FINANCES
Don’t let them take you by surprise. Abusive partners would do everything to take total control of your whole existence. This doesn’t refer only to your mind and body, but also to your material possessions or any other possible loopholes that may help you escape their claws.
Finances, personal belongings, and properties are the first on their list. Without these things, you are stuck inside the abuser’s hell.
7. APOLOGIZES FOR THEIR BEHAVIOR, BUT NEVER CHANGES
These things are at the very core of their manipulative games.
A toxic partner will apologize for everything they’ve done to you and lure you back in the trap by promising that they’ll change.
Do you want the truth? It’s all a lie. A bittersweet lie carefully packed and wrapped up in a silky bow made to distort your reality and push you into oblivion until you no longer know what’s what.