Self-respect. The main and most important virtue in life. It has everything to do with being true to yourself, living free, expressing your innermost feelings and your true, vivid colors to the world without being afraid that someone might judge you.
In a nutshell, self-respect means being comfortable in your own skin.
However, self-respect is something that not all of us understand. You’d be surprised how many people are actually okay with putting themselves aside and accepting the intolerable for the sake of others.
So, can you say that you respect yourself?
Here are 12 signs that might show you’re being a little too disrespectful to yourself:
1. YOU LET PEOPLE TELL YOU HOW TO LIVE YOUR LIFE
You let people control your life. You allow them to walk all over you. A clear sign that you have no respect for yourself is the fact that you give people the right to decide for you.
2. YOU IGNORE YOUR GUT FEELING
Disrespecting yourself means denying your emotions. It means ignoring your intuition and following another person’s idea of what’s good for you. Remember: Your gut feeling is always right. Do not avoid its screams.
3. YOU ALLOW OTHERS TO TAKE ADVANTAGE OF YOUR KINDNESS
It’s not enough that people control your life, you also let them take advantage of your pure and kind heart. They’ve seen how sensitive you are, and they know that they can literally pull off anything without you saying a word.
4. YOU HIDE YOUR REAL EMOTIONS
The worst thing you can do to yourself is hiding your own emotions. It shows a great deal of disrespect towards yourself since it’s clear that you’re not comfortable with who you truly are.
But, you have to understand. Regardless of what your feelings are, you have to be able to accept them and express them.
5. YOU PROMISE MORE THAN YOU CAN ACTUALLY DO
Disrespecting is also saying YES when your gut clearly screams NO. When you take on far more than you can handle, and you promise to do things you can’t do. When you stop respecting your needs for the sake of other people’s needs.
You need to stop denying yourself.
6. YOU ARE AFRAID OF CHASING YOUR DREAMS
Your dreams are always last on your priority list. You are so busy with doing things for others that you are actually too exhausted to go on and chase your dreams. The days pass you by as you silently suffer, and choose not to do anything about it.
If that isn’t disrespectful, I don’t know what is.
7. YOU’RE FORCING YOURSELF TO DO THINGS YOU HATE
Oftentimes, you catch yourself doing things that you don’t like doing out of fear that people might get mad at you and leave you. Believe me, that is not love. People who care about you would never let you accept doing the things you hate.
Stop making yourself miserable.
8. YOU’RE TOO HARD ON YOURSELF
A healthy dose of self-criticism is essential. But, when self-criticism starts transforming into self-hate and resentment, that’s when a person loses every bit of respect for themselves.
9. YOU RARELY PUT YOURSELF FIRST
You have to stop denying your needs and start focusing on yourself. Your priority list should start with your preferences as top priorities. You are the only person who can take care of yourself. If you don’t do it, no one will.
10. YOU SEEK APPROVAL FROM OTHERS
Disrespecting yourself means denying your own mind and seeking validation from other people instead. It literally shows that you’re not capable of deciding for yourself, so you let others make the choice for you.
Don’t let your insecurities get to you. Know your worth.
11. YOU ARE INCREDIBLY JUDGMENTAL
You are constantly judging people’s choices, lifestyles, opinions, beliefs. So, it’s no wonder you judge yourself. You are not comfortable with who you are.
But, you have to find a way to get out of your ignorant bubble and start perceiving the world from a different perspective.
12. YOU ALWAYS END UP STUCK IN TOXIC RELATIONSHIPS
As a result, you often find yourself stuck in toxic, abusive relationships.
You need to let go of your “victim” mentality and understand that you are a human being who deserves to be happy. However, in order to get there, you need to regain your lost self-respect.
Don’t be afraid to show your true colors and stand your ground. If you want people to respect you, you need to first respect yourself. Your genuine, peculiar, weird, amazing self.
Image: Víctor Candia