When you truly love someone, you accept them as they are. You accept their insecurities and fears. You embrace their darkest sides.
When you genuinely love someone, you don’t tell them how your relationship would be perfect if they’d “fix” one or two of their flaws. Instead, you feel happy with them as they are right here and right now.
When you’re truly in love with someone, you don’t try to change them. You don’t force them to become someone they are not. You don’t tell them that they’d be much more lovable or look more attractive if they would just stop being themselves and become somebody else.
When you genuinely love someone, you accept them in their entirety. You revel in who they are, including those parts of them you find annoying and unpleasant. You embrace their irritating habits. Their quirks. Their past mistakes and failures. Their baggage.
Yet, accepting the person you love the way they are doesn’t mean that you let them treat you unfairly and badly. It doesn’t mean that you justify their bad behavior. It doesn’t mean you make excuses for their hurtful words and mistakes because you believe they have a justifiable reason for treating you that way.
If they’re making you beg for their attention and love, if they’re disrespecting you in any way, or if they’re behaving towards you like you’re worthless, then you shouldn’t try to fix them or change them – but leave them.
But if you’re in a relationship with someone who treats you with respect, kindness, and affection, then you have to follow different rules.
When you’re with this kind of person, you try to understand why they get mad at you for seemingly no reason or get suspicious of your behavior. You try to understand the situation from their point of view.
When you truly love someone, you give them a second chance when they make a mistake. You accept their apology and forgive them when they realize that they’ve hurt your feelings.
When you’re genuinely in love with someone, you don’t criticize and blame them for having trust issues. You don’t make them feel ashamed of their past and failed relationships. Instead, you support and encourage them to overcome whatever is bothering them and making them unhappy. You encourage them to do better. To be better.
When you love someone, you don’t use their weaknesses and fears against them. You don’t make them feel weak or unworthy because of their vulnerabilities, insecurities, and mistakes. You don’t make them feel ashamed of who they are.
When you truly love someone, you accept every part of them. You make sure they know that you love them for who they are and that they don’t have to change. You make sure they know they’re perfect to you with all their imperfections.
