Home Love & Relationships The Vital Difference Between ‘Loving’ Someone And ‘Being In Love’ With Them

The Vital Difference Between ‘Loving’ Someone And ‘Being In Love’ With Them


Do you know what’s the difference between loving someone and being in love with someone?

If you don’t know the difference, don’t worry. I didn’t know it as well. I thought that these two terms were the same. I mean, you love the person you are in love with, right?

Well, not always.

And while I was thinking about this topic, one thought popped into my mind. I remembered how I felt when I first met him – my first love.

I will never forget the butterflies in my stomach and the tone of his voice when he was saying my name. I spent my days fantasizing about our first date. I created the most perfect love scenarios in my head. The thought of him was enough to make me happy and if I was lucky to catch a glimpse of him – that was pure ecstasy.

With him, I learned how to fall in love with the idea of being with someone who I considered my soulmate. My perfect person. The love of my life.

However, these innocent views changed drastically when experienced the feeling of being in a real relationship.

In that relationship, I realized what loneliness and heartbreak feel like. I learned pain. I got introduced to betrayal as well.

And still, I wanted to be there for you. I tried my best to help you heal from your past wounds and traumas. I did my best to understand you and be considerate of your feelings.

My one wish was to be your confidante, your best friend, and lover. The one that you’ll always go to wipe your tears and kiss your pain away. The one who loves you unconditionally. The one who’ll inspire you to be the man you’ve always wanted to be.

And that’s how I learned that loving someone and being in love with someone are two different things. They differ in their intensity, depth, and purpose.

Being in love is the attraction. The butterflies in the stomach. The ecstatic feelings over the shallow signs and sentiments that he or she gives you.

Loving someone, on the other hand, is a conscious decision that you make that you will be devoting your heart and soul to someone no matter what happens and in spite of all your differences.

So, how many of you love someone?

Image: Mariusz

Mary Wright