We all want to experience that genuine, raw, deep, lasting, once-in-a-lifetime kind of love. We all want to find that one person who will love us honestly, intensely, and unconditionally. We want to find the person who will make us feel loved, respected, and whole. The person who will make our life happier and more meaningful and exciting. We all want to find ‘The One.’
But the real question is: What happens when you do find that person?
What many people believe is that when you’re in a relationship with the right person, things should be easy. They believe that your love should feel effortless. Well, they’re right but to a certain extent. Because the truth is that love is never a smooth journey.
In fact, there are 5 phases of love that all couples eventually go through. And the reason why a lot of couples end their relationship is that they’re unable to pass phase 3.
Here are the 5 phases of love:
1. PHASE 1: EXCITEMENT AND PASSION
From the moment you start feeling the first butterflies in your stomach for someone to the moment when you have that first and unforgettable romantic kiss, and to the first time you’re physically intimate, the first phase is all about playfulness and passion.
This is the phase when your hormones are running wild and you simply can’t stop thinking about the person you’re in love with. It’s also the phase in which you can’t wait to see and spend time with your partner and when you hope that this honeymoon phase will never end.
2. PHASE 2: LOVE DEEPENS AND THINGS ARE GETTING SERIOUS
In this phase, you still cuddle during a movie and enjoy exchanging kisses and hugs when you’re together, but something has changed. Perhaps you’ve moved in together or perhaps even got married and started a family.
In this phase, the connection between you and your partner gets deeper and more meaningful. You also start feeling more comfortable showing your vulnerable sides to each other and, more importantly, you feel free and comfortable being yourself in each other’s presence.
3. PHASE 3: REAL LIFE TESTS YOUR RELATIONSHIP/MARRIAGE AT EVERY TURN
Unfortunately, this is the phase when many couples break up. The honeymoon phase has ended and parenthood, family commitments, and work problems have come into focus. You begin to wonder where all the passion and excitement that you two used to enjoy disappeared.
The small and seemingly unimportant things you found annoying about your partner now appear like big problems. You start having frequent fights and getting mad over trivial things. You also start feeling tense around each other or even trapped.
In phase 3, a lot of couples begin wondering whether they made the right decision and whether they’d be better off single.
4. PHASE 4: UNDERSTANDING AND ACCEPTANCE
If you survive phase 3, you and your partner will begin to see and accept each other the way you really are. In phase 4, you begin to embrace each other’s insecurities, fears, and mistakes. You realize that your significant other is not a perfect person and that they have flaws just like you.
In this phase, you’re also committed to finding ways to solve both your relationship and personal problems. And you make sure your relationship is based on mutual acceptance, understanding, patience, and compassion.
5. PHASE 5: COMMITMENT
Now that you’ve accepted each other’s flaws and rediscovered each other’s qualities and desires, you can work together as a team.
In this phase, both of you recognize that you can be happy and fulfilled pursuing different goals and passions. You both also show that you’re willing to work together on the relationship, rekindle the flame of romance, and make the love between you last forever.