You meet a guy that you actually like. Finally, the universe is throwing you a bone. He asks you on a date. You cannot hide the excitement and it almost seems like your heart is going to burst out of your chest.
You go out with him and there are sparks flying all over the place. The fireworks between the two of you are so intense and bright that you start imagining your whole life beside them.
But then, after a certain period of dating and slowly falling love with him, he notices that you are getting too attached and he just vanishes. Completely disappears in thin air. Suddenly, you are left all alone, wondering why he would do that to you when he said that he loved you.
You are hoping that he will come back, but as days pass by, that hope grows smaller and smaller. Until you finally realize that you’ve fallen in love with a heartless and immature person who manipulated you and left you the second you revealed your vulnerable side.
We’ve all been there, right?
This might sound a bit over the top, but the reality out there is not really different than this story. The game of dating is sometimes crueler than you think. You fall in love for the first time, you let your guard down and BAM! Your ‘beloved’ strikes you down.
It hurts I know. And it is pretty normal to feel frustrated and angry for days. It’s pretty normal to want to find them, punch them in the face and then beg them to come back to you. It’s all a part of the healing process.
However, wanting and doing that are two completely different things. Because, if you think that begging him to get back to you means fighting for your relationship, you are terribly wrong. A person who leaves you does not love you. Therefore, bombarding his voice mail and his messenger with 50 messages won’t change that fact.
So, here’s what. Why don’t you just take the hint and get over it?
I know that it’s easier to say it than to actually do it, but I mean, come on… You cannot possibly tell me that you are willing to fight for this person after he broke your heart and cold-bloodedly ghosted you. That is madness. Or shall I say, masochism?
Instead of being that sad, pathetic and miserable girl who begs for love and attention, be the girl who will let go of him the minute she senses that he’s no longer interested.
When I think about how much time and energy I’ve wasted on people who were not worthy enough I honestly want to cry. All of that precious time could have been spent doing something more productive, something more rewarding. But, oh well. It is what it is. After all, mistakes are done to help us grow and evolve as people.
That is exactly why I am saying this to you.
I may have suffered the consequences of following my dumb girl logic and my pure, naïve, loving heart, but you don’t have to. There’s nothing worse than regretting your actions and longing for the years that you’ve wasted in vain.
So, please let’s just stop holding on to people who do not value us. Let’s stop giving third chances to people who didn’t even deserve the second. Let’s stop investing our energy in relationships that are bad for us.
Instead, let’s start focusing on what we want and what we need. Because our mental, emotional and physical wellbeing depends only on us. We are the only caretakers of our body and soul
Life is to short to spend it fighting for someone who does not care about you. If the love does not challenge you, inspires you to grow, fills you with passion and sparks a fire inside your heart, then it’s not worth it. Trust me.