Home Stories Spending More Time Alone Is Not Selfish – It’s Called Self Care

Spending More Time Alone Is Not Selfish – It’s Called Self Care

Spending More Time Alone Is Not Selfish – It’s Called Self Care

Whoever told you that canceling plans when you don’t feel like socializing and making more time to be on your own is selfish and rude of you, does not mean you well, my friend. I know this because I’ve spent an awful amount of time in my life explaining to people how wanting to do things on my own has nothing to do with them, but everything to do with me.

It’s not wrong to need social distance from people. To want to isolate yourself in your own world. Spending time alone is one of the first things we all need to do on our journey of self-love and self-care. It has been proven that people who regularly partake in self-care and make more time for themselves are generally calmer and happier than those who are always busy satisfying other people’s needs.

So, sorry, but I am not sorry. Being alone with myself feeds my soul and makes me happy. And if that makes me feel way better than socializing with people, then I’ll do it. The following are 17 things that only people who enjoy being alone will understand:

1. Imagine this. It’s Friday afternoon, the end of a workweek and you have your whole weekend for yourself. No plans, no responsibilities, no dates, no people, no nothing. Only you and yourself. I cannot think of a better party.

2. Finally finding the time to enjoy your favorite book, show, movie, music, hobby, and whatnot.

3. Planning a whole weekend trip by yourself. Let’s be honest. There is truly nothing more exciting than making plans on your own. At least for me. You get to choose the places you want to visit, pack up your things without anyone rushing you, choose a way of transport that suits you the most, spent quality time alone with your thoughts, and get to know yourself a bit better in the process.

4. Making a trip to a remote cabin in the woods on your own. A bit scary for some, but oh so good if you ask me. You don’t really need much there, only good food and beautiful weather.

5. Eating all alone at a restaurant or taking yourself to a cup of coffee and a donut without feeling ashamed or uncomfortable in any way. That truly is the best feeling in the whole wide world.

6. Um, clinginess? I apologize to all of my partners with whom I had to break it off after a certain period of time… but what can I say? I could never change who I am for someone else. My personal space and time are sacred to me. I need air to breathe. I need freedom.

7. Being completely independent. That is the first word that comes to people’s minds when they think of me. That’s how I’ve been raised. My freedom and self-reliance are what made me who I am today.

8. Having a strong intuition about all the things happening to you. I am sure most of you out there will agree on this. Our high intuition is a direct result of the insane amount of time we spend alone.

9. Not being afraid of the single life. Being able to find happiness within yourself without feeling the need to be completed by another person is rare nowadays. It takes great courage, self-awareness, and strong will to do so. Something that not all of the people out there have.

10. Always creating. Constantly working on something new. Someone creative. Something that feeds both our souls and minds.

11. Observing other people’s behavior from afar. It is just something that we all do. It’s a way of gathering knowledge about the world around us. Watching and studying people’s behaviors may sound strange, but it helps us get inside someone else’s shoes and feel what they feel.

12. Hanging out with a small group of people. The more, the merrier, but the less, the more intimate for sure.

13. Enjoying rainy days and colder weather. Just knowing that the streets are empty and everyone is at home cozied up in their beds makes me feel calm. It gives me peace of mind. It’s weird, but this kind of weather gives me the excuse to hibernate in the comfort of my home and just be alone with my thoughts. And that, if you ask me, is priceless to me.

14. Contemplating life. And asking myself some of the hardest questions over and over again.

15. Emptying a bottle of red all alone. I am not saying it’s not fun do friends. I am just saying that there’s something special about enjoying a glass of wine alone. It’s my idea of a day spent well.

16. Spending more time in nature alone. Being present. Becoming one with everything around you.

17. Secretly enjoying canceled plans. Once again, sorry but not sorry for what I am about to say. Canceled plans make me happy. And I know a lot of people that feel the same. It has nothing to do with me hating people. Quite on the contrary, it has everything to do with giving myself enough time to reflect on everything in my life.

Stephanie Reeds