Imagining a relationship between an empath and a narcissist is not so hard. In fact, the main relationship target for a narcissist is an empath. And when you want a literal example of how two opposites attract, you don’t have to go further than this.
Narcissists are emotionally wounded people. The shockingly unempathetic way they perceive reality is due to the fact that they were most probably perceived that way by their parents and/or peers in their childhood.
This traumatic imprint is what draws the healing empath in, and the healing and tolerant nature of the empath is what the narcissist craves for. You’d think that this would make them the perfect pair – both complementing each other and learning from one another of qualities that would complete them.
As romantic as this may sound, the truth is rather perverted and disturbing. The attraction between these two types of people is one full of fiery magnetism – but the relationship is one that soon turns into a toxic hell.
Empaths like to see the good in people, and they are always aware that people are made up of both good and bad qualities. However, this idealistic tendency is what the narcissist uses to deepen their manipulation and well-devised agenda to take complete control over the empath’s life and thus boost their grandiose self-image.
Narcissism is not a game to be played with. It’s a deep psychological disturbance which needs special attention. However, the empath thinks that they can teach them how to be human again and that there is nothing in this world that the ‘good’ hasn’t thawed.
While mutual influence will inevitably be present and will thus affect both partners’ personalities, this is in no way healing. In truth, the empath doesn’t easily give in to the narcissist’s perverted sense of reality, but long-lasting influence has inevitable effects.
After a while, the emotionally-scarred empath will take on some narcissistic traits as a mechanism for defense and manipulation. The narcissist slowly starts to win their game and manages to turn the emotional and devoted empath into what they would never like to become.
Meanwhile, there is constant narcissistic abuse which slowly scars every part of the empath’s self-esteem and confidence. Even when the empath cannot take it anymore and decides to end the relationship, a short heartfelt apology is enough for them to change their mind again.
The truth is, while the empath believes that these two opposites are meant to achieve balance, the narcissist abuses the empath’s nature to remain and consolidate their reign in the twisted reality they’re building around themselves.
In the end, the cycle of narcissism can move on to the empath, should they fail to either take control over the relationship or leave. Everyone who is deeply hurt is vulnerable to becoming a narcissist.
So, what should the empath do?
While a whole book could be written on how the control can be taken over from the narcissist (and perhaps even some therapy wouldn’t hurt), the easiest question to answer is how to leave a narcissist, if you are planning to.
The best way to end a relationship with a narcissist is to simply leave without a warning or previous discussion related to it. Of course, you might even receive some very negative reactions once you do it, but it’s for the best.
The truth is, the treatment you receive is not something you deserve. It’s up to you how you will make sure that you don’t get what you don’t deserve.