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Overthinking Is Not Bad: We Overthink Because We Overlove

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Overthinking Is Not Bad: We Overthink Because We Overlove

I see you asking the same question over and over again and I feel like I know you. I see you overexplaining yourself and apologizing for something that you don’t owe an apology and it is like a deja vu…

The truth is, I know you, my dear. I know the way your heart beats. I know why your eyes move nervously. I know why you feel so distressed. 

You cannot pull yourself together to make an important decision without obsessing about it for at least a week.

You cannot send a simple text message without re-reading and changing the text more than ten times.

You struggle to let go of things that bother you. You feel guilty saying NO. You over apologize for things that you didn’t do wrong. You can’t relax and just enjoy the moment. You find it hard to detach yourself from all the confusing, noisy thoughts inside your mind and finally let your hair down.

Because you, my love, you are an overthinker.

You have a very busy mind, but you consider it your flaw.

While everyone else is going with the flow, you are right there, with both your feet on the ground, not letting anything get you carried away.

Well, let me tell you something. Even though your overthinking seems like an over-obsessive behavior that only causes you to stress, that is not entirely true. Those who have accepted their overthinking, loud minds know this. Overthinking means that you care. 

You overthink because you, my darling, you overlove.

You have a big, generous heart that has a lot to offer to this world. So, when you fall for a special someone, you give everything you have to that person. You do not love half-assed, you love from the bottom of your heart without holding anything back. You do not love for the moment, but for all eternity. You do not invest half of what you own, but instead, you invest every bit of your soul.

You love from the very bottom of your heart. Without a fear, without any boundary or regret. You love with all of your being. You love and respect each and every one of the people in your life. And you’d do anything to make them happy.

That is why you overthink. You do it because you want everything to be perfect. You do it because you care. You do it because you want this person to know just how much they mean to you. Most importantly, you do it because you take your relationships seriously.

Of course, I cannot deny that your insecurities and fears play a big part in all of this. I know how it is. You cannot simply avoid that dreadful feeling that you’re wasting someone’s time. That you’re not good enough or that you do not try hard enough to give them what they deserve. When you have some unresolved issues with yourself, that emotion is always there to haunt you and make you feel worthless.

But you have to focus on the bigger picture and realize that all of this is simply because you’ve got a lot of love to give in that pretty, little heart of yours.

Part of it shows that deep inside you are insecure. It shows that you are desperate for love, acceptance, and respect.

But, the other part?

Oh, the other part shows that you own a big heart capable of loving every single person on this earth. That you truly care about the ones who mean to you. And that you would do anything in the world to let them know that you’re there for them.

When you love someone that hard, you cannot avoid your loud, curious mind. You just overthink.

Stephanie Reeds