“You are everything to me.” “I can’t imagine loving someone more than I love you.” “You are perfect to me.” “You are my whole world.” Who doesn’t love hearing these words? They are so touching, so heart-warming, so beautiful. But, they are only words and they mean nothing if they are not accompanied by actions.
If your partner says they love you and yet when you need them they are always too busy, that’s not love. Hearing words of love is always beautiful, but when they are only words and that someone doesn’t choose you every day, that’s not enough.
“I love you” doesn’t mean anything if it is followed by lies, cheating, manipulation, neglect, and abuse in any kind. “I am here for you” are only words if what they mean is “as long as I want to.”
Because, at the end of the day, we don’t remember how many times someone has told us they love us, what we do remember is how many times someone was there for us when we needed them. We remember who was with us when we felt sick, who took care of us. And we always remember who made us feel sad and lonely, who doesn’t have time for us, who treats us as an option.
Finally, a healthy relationship needs both things to thrive.
Actions do matter the most, but we also need to hear that we are loved from time to time. We need our loved one to hold us and remind us how much we mean to them. Otherwise, we’ll get lost and confused.