Admit it, we all dream of one thing in life.
To find love. To learn to love and to feel what it’s like to be loved. To be held. To be accepted the way we are. To be understood when the whole world turns against us. To be cherished. To simply be embraced in a special, unique way.
We all dream of finding our soulmate.
But the reality is, it doesn’t always go as planned. The Disney stories that we’ve been raised with don’t do reality much justice. It is not always easy to find your one true love. Sometimes, we mistake passersby for soulmates. Sometimes we mistake lessons for soulmates. And sometimes, it takes a bit more time and faith to meet the one true love of our life.
Some people say you only get one chance at love.
Some believe that every person we meet is a part of our soul.
Personally, I believe in both.
Our three loves of our life begin with the first one. Oh, the first love… How pure does that sound? The first love is one of the most life-changing, intense, and unique experiences in life. That’s the moment when we first come face to face with our feelings. The moment when we learn what’s like to be in love with another person. The first love is often intense. We are new to love. Everything is fresh. Pure. It feels like being a part of a fairytale. We don’t think about boundaries, nor heartbreaks. We give in completely, convincing ourselves that this is going to last forever. That this person next to us is THE ONE.
And surprisingly, some people end up marrying their first love. But in most cases, this love doesn’t last. It ends up hurting us when we least expect it, it leaves us feeling broken and devastated, without any hope that the future might bring us exactly what we need. However, it impacts our lives in a significant way. For it teaches us a great lesson.
After a long period of mourning our loss, we eventually open up to another adventure. The second love. This time, we are not as reckless as before. We approach it with caution as though it is a game that this time, we must win at. And perhaps that is the main reason why it doesn’t always last, no matter how much we try to make it last. There is a certain pressure that we often add to it, which in most cases is nothing but a result of our past traumas. And that is what usually backfires after a certain period. If first love teaches us a lesson about ourselves, the second love teaches us to let go. It teaches us that life isn’t always fair.
And then, comes the third love. After a few failed relationships, heartbreaks, and tears, the third love emerges when you least expect it. It comes slowly and silently. In the beginning, you don’t even notice it. It usually comes in other forms. Forms that do not remind you of romantic love. Especially not after you’ve been hurt and your hopes had been taken away for too many times. This time you don’t trust. You don’t go all in. In fact, you stay away. You stay far away because you know what pain feels like. And you know that you’d never ever go through it again.
However, when love comes, it doesn’t ask you if it can enter. It simply does. And once it does, it fills your entire life with light. It brings back your hopes and gives you a reason to believe once more. Even though your brain tells you not to. Your heart is louder and stronger than you because this time it’s for real. This time, it just feels right.