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I May Look Like A Bitch, But Trust Me, I Have A Soft And Loving Heart

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I’ve been often told that I look bitchier than I actually am.

And, even if that fact kind of bothers me, I will be honest with you and say that it is probably true.

I look like a bitch. I know I seem kind of rude. I can be harsh. I tend to be honest to the point of being blunt. And sometimes I can be brutal. Sometimes, I can’t help myself.

The thing is, I’ve always fought for my rights. I’ve been fierce and passionate about what belongs to me. I’ve carefully guarded my soul and protected my beliefs.

So, I may look like a bitch you, but it is all because I know my worth. I will stand my ground even if the sky is falling down. I will never stay quiet while someone is stabbing my back. I will never keep calm while someone is behaving unjustly. Not on my watch.

I may look rude to you, but you have to get to know me first before you judge me. My kindness and love are something you have to deserve. If you are nice to me, I will show you more than you can imagine. But, if I receive trouble, I will give trouble back. Don’t ever doubt that.

I look like a bitch because I’ve been through a lot in life, and my guard is high up. For a very long time, I trusted people I should have never trust, and I ended up completely destroyed. So, I decided that I’m done. For good.

From that moment on, I promised myself that I will never give myself easily. I will never believe those fake smiles, those vain words, and those sweet lies.

So, I may look like a bitch to you, but what’s really underneath this cold exterior is much different.

You may judge me without knowing a single thing about me, you may trash me because of my harsh behavior, you may say that I am cold and heartless, but the real people in my life will always understand me.

They are the only people who know how vulnerable my heart is. They are the only people who understand how sensitive I am. The only people who know what I really feel inside my soul. And the only people who know why I am the way I am.

I might come off as selfish and inconsiderate, but if you only tried to get to know me before you judge me, you’d realize how fragile my soul is. If you only tried to come near me, you’d understand what triggers my guard.

I might seem rude and cold, but you will ever know the sacrifices I’ve made for people who didn’t even deserve my time. You will never know the pain of longing for someone you can’t be with because they are toxic in a human form. It is exhausting. And frustrating.

I look like a bitch, but only I know how hard it is to pretend you don’t care about anyone when your heart pounds like crazy and your hands sweat with anxiety.

So, please. Don’t be so quick to judge me. I’ve been keeping this for so long, but I finally decided to let it out in the open.

I seem stronger than I actually am. Deep inside, there’s a confused and terrified little girl who is waiting to be saved. Get to know me, show me why I should trust you and let me welcome you into my world.

Stephanie Reeds