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I Am Not Looking To Get Married, I Just Want To Be Happy


It looks like everywhere I go there is the word ‘love.’ From advertisements and Valentines day’s cards to marriage invitations and couples holding hands. It’s like everything serves as a reminder that singlehood is not okay. That it is not something that we should look forward to. Everything seems to be “encouraging” us to get married and start a family, making us feel guilty if we choose to follow our career instead.

Yes, love is beautiful. A deep connection with someone whose soul aligns with yours is also something wonderful and rare to find.

However, sometimes we forget that there is so much more to life than settling down and getting married. Sometimes love is not everything. Love is not a person. We forget that love is a feeling and we can find it within ourselves.

I admit that for a long time I’ve been feeling like I was missing out on something while I was watching all my friends and colleagues getting married and having children. I was happy for them, but secretly I was asking myself, “Why doesn’t this happen for me? Will it ever happen?”

Now I realize that I was bothered by the things I didn’t have instead of being grateful for everything that I have and everything that I am. And I have an amazing opportunity for growth and self-improvement ahead of me.

I no longer feel pressured to find that “perfect someone” and get married. Honestly, I am not even looking for love. I only want to be happy with the person I am and the life that I’ve created for myself.

If someone happens to walk into my life and we “click,” then okay. But I am not looking to find someone just because everyone has a partner. I don’t want someone to fill my broken pieces and heal my wounds. I can do that myself.

I refuse to chase a person instead of chasing my dreams. I don’t want to have someone just so that I don’t end up alone. I don’t believe that someone could fill my life better before I fill it with all the beautiful things I’ve planned for myself.

Don’t get me wrong, I am not chasing away people. It’s just that romance is not my number one priority.

I am chasing happiness. I am chasing my ambitions. I am slowly but surely becoming the woman I want to be.

And when I am ready for love, I am sure that love will find me. A love who is also ready for me.

Mary Wright