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How To Accept And *Love* Yourself Who You Really Are

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It’s Not Your Responsibility To Fix Someone And Make Them A Better Person

Self-love. Why is it so hard to learn it?

We arrive on this earth as young souls with pure minds and hearts. We know nothing about how wicked and cruel this world is. Nothing about how dangerous humans can be. Nothing about what awaits us ahead. We only exist. We trust our instincts, we breathe deeply, we do things when we feel like, we play, we create, we give and we love without ever holding anything back.

And then, we grow up. We replace those lovely feelings with fear, insecurities, and doubt and slowly we start learning to un-love ourselves. Tell me, how unbelievably stupid is that? Instead of connecting with our highest selves, we turn our back on who we really are.

Imagine how beautiful this world would be if we only knew how to love ourselves. If we only learned to accept ourselves with all the flaws and forgive our mistakes no matter what other people thought of us. Just try to imagine how different your life would be like if you woke up every morning knowing how worthy you are and how big of a role you have on this journey called life.

I dare you to imagine all of that and more. But also, I dare you to accept yourself. To understand that no matter how flawed, scarred, sinful, different, and strange you are, you deserve to be happy. You, my dear, deserve to be loved.  

And who can love you better than your own self?

Here are the 5  best ways to learn what self-love really means:

1. Look at yourself in the mirror and say I love you. Okay, I get it, it does sound cringy. But, you know what? It really works. And sometimes, you don’t even have to speak. Simply gazing at your own face and noticing the flaws that make you YOU is enough. Still, you have to remember one thing. You must never forget to look even deeper and accept those parts of yourself that are not always visible. Your failures, your mistakes, your fears, your insecurities.

2. Do more things that make your heart sing. Do whatever lifts your spirits, whatever gives you a reason to get up in the morning and be the best version of yourself. Do it without explaining yourself to someone. Do it with love. Because when you do the opposite, when you constantly deny yourself the things, the people, the food, the life that you dream of, you send a pretty bad message. You convince yourself that you are not worth it. And so, the vicious cycle continues.

3. Give positive affirmations a try. Again, I get it, it does sound cringe. But, also once again, it really does work. Trust me, I wouldn’t say this if it didn’t. You don’t have to make a big ceremony out of it if you don’t want to. All you need to make them work is your faith. You have to believe that everything you put your mind to is possible. That no matter how hard it is for something to come true, there is a way, if only one has faith. You have to really feel the desire burning in your chest, you have to want something so badly and get excited only by the thought of it to make it work…

4. Stop comparing yourself with others. Stop making fun of yourself. Get rid of the self-deprecating humor. Hush those loud, discouraging voices in your head. It is your uniqueness and quirkiness that makes you your most awesome self. You are yourself because of your strengths and good qualities, but also because of your weaknesses and flaws. You are yourself because you are special. There is no one out there like you.

5. Let love shed a light on you. If you caught yourself one too many times looking down on everything you are and everything you do, then please, I beg of you, stop it. Stop doubting yourself. Stop putting yourself in the corner. Stop judging yourself. Embrace the real you. The one that is deep within you. The one that you so desperately try to hide. That is the real version of you. That is who you are. Accept it and let love flow through you. Fall in love with every silly imperfection and every flaw that makes you special.

Stephanie Reeds