I’ve always enjoyed doing things alone. It’s not that I don’t like being around people. I’ve done those introvert/extrovert tests and I’ve always got 80% extrovert. I love socializing, I love my people, I enjoy spending quality time with them. But when it comes to doing the things I love, I prefer to do them on my own. With no one around me.
There’s something about shopping alone or grabbing lunch and eating on a bench in the park or taking myself on a date to the library, or simply walking by myself that has always made me more appreciative of the time I spent with myself. Perhaps it’s because I am an only child and spending time alone has always been a way of entertaining myself. Or perhaps because finding who I am and getting to know the real me is the biggest goal I’ve set for myself ever since I was a child.
The point of this story is, I am the loner type. I enjoy my own company. But I know many people who don’t. People who are afraid to be alone. People who think doing things on their own is embarrassing and desperate. People who hush their insecurities and fears instead of facing them head-on. People who are always in the company of a bunch of friends, because that way they won’t have to listen to their loud thoughts. That way they have the perfect distraction.
I’ve got one thing I want to ask these people… Why? Why the fear? Why the doubt?
What are you so afraid of? Coming across something you don’t like about yourself?
You may not be aware of this right now, but we are always alone, no matter how many friends we have. We are born alone and we die alone. So why not embrace that solitude and use it to explore that wonderful world of yours?
I am not saying we should be the same. We couldn’t even if we tried. I cannot force you to enjoy the same things I enjoy, nor can I make you do something that you don’t feel comfortable doing. That’s not what I am trying to do though. What I want you to understand is that there is no relationship more valuable and giving than the relationship you create with yourself. There is no bigger blessing than being comfortable with your own thoughts. There is nothing more precious than enjoying your company.
And trust me, you won’t understand a single word that I am saying until you actually get out of your shell and do that. I can write a whole book about it, but you won’t feel the message I am trying to convey until you feel the blissful feeling of being alone on your own. Until you go out into the world by yourself. Until you stop waiting on people to do the things you want. Until you encourage yourself to talk to strangers and make the first step. Until you find the strength inside of you to make a reservation on your name and take yourself out on a date. Until you fall in love with who you really are.
In those moments, you’ll feel something that you’ve never felt before. Pure bliss. Your senses will heighten, suddenly the world will seem much brighter, much colorful, much happier. And with it, so will you.
So, don’t be afraid. Don’t ignore yourself. Don’t miss out on things in life. Go out and live your life. Live it freely. Live it the way you’ve always dreamt of. Be alone with yourself no matter how weird it makes you feel. Be alone until you fall in love with your true colors. Learn to enjoy your own company. Be there for yourself in ways that others couldn’t. Give yourself the love that others didn’t.
There is truly nothing more important in life than the relationship you create with yourself.