Some people’s worst fear is being abandoned, but I am not one of those people. Early on in my life, I lived through being abandoned. I don’t need to fear it because it’s already the reality that I’ve had to deal with.
We haven’t spoken in a long time, and maybe that was for the best. Despite that, I want to tell you what you’ve missed. This is a letter to the dad that left me when I was just a child.
Thank You For Leaving
I could sit here and curse your name all I wanted, but I’m not angry. Yes, there was a time when I was furious because of your actions. Despite my anger back then, I’ve since gotten over it. Now, I’m no longer mad, I’m just grateful.
Thank you for leaving me when I was so young. Thank you for not putting through the heartbreak of having you leave when I was older because then I would have really understood what was happening. When you abandoned me, I had no concept of what it really meant. For that, I’m thankful.
I’m Better Now Because Of It
Growing up without a dad can go one of two ways. Either you spend years upset and doing self-destructive things, or you pick yourself up and get on with life. I decided to do the latter.
Since you weren’t there and my mom was busy trying to be both parents, I had to do a lot of things on my own. I learned how to be my own hero. Now, I don’t need anyone to help me because I’ve been doing things on my own for my whole life. I’m self-reliant, independent, smart, and a survivor, and that’s all because of you.
I didn’t just learn how to get by on my own, I learned how to get over things too. When the worst thing that could happen to me happened, I got over it. Instead of breaking down or bottling up my feeling and letting them overwhelm me, I dealt with it. Now, I’m strong enough to deal with anything that comes my way in life.
You Missed Out on a Lot
I’m sorry that you had to miss out on all my birthdays, all the plays that I was in, and all my recitals. You didn’t get to see me get my driver’s license or graduate from university. In the future, you won’t get to see me get married, start a family, and build a career.
The reason that I’m sorry, is because I know that a real dad would have been proud to be a part of it all.
I grew up to be a strong, smart, kind, and generous woman. I grew up to be a woman that you will never know. Although you may not even think about me anymore, I know that your life is emptier because you abandoned your own child. Now you can live with that guilt.
To the dad that left me, you made the right choice. If you didn’t love me enough to even try and be a part of my life, then you shouldn’t have. I’ve surrounded myself with the family and friends who truly love me. You didn’t want to know me, and now the feeling is mutual.
To the person reading this who was abandoned by their dad, know that he didn’t deserve to know you in the first place. You are an amazing person, and I wish you so much happiness without him.
