Although it is healthy for your mind and body to have hobbies and interests separate to your partner’s, it is equally important in a healthy relationship to have shared interests. If you and your partner have too many different hobbies and interests, the chances are your paths will rarely cross, becoming a driving force in the breakdown of your relationship. Relationships, both romantic and plutonic, are about having fun and doing things together.
The success of any relationship is about making compromises and sacrifices; encouraging each other to be the best version of yourselves. Acknowledging your loved one’s passions is a step forward and can help you to better understand how your partner operates as an individual. Having a partner that has hobbies and interests they are motivated by should be a turn-on, not an inconvenience. Take the chance to watch your partner in action or attempt to share your partner’s hobby with them. Whether it’s going to watch their favorite sports team, watch them taking part in motor races or rallies, or witnessing their live performance as part of a music band. It’s a chance to understand how they tick. You never know, you might surprise yourself and enjoy the experience after writing it off as boring all these years.
Look into new potential hobbies or interests that you can share together
The best way to enjoy quality time together is through finding a hobby or interest that you can share, creating new traditions and memories in the process. Some couples – regardless of whether you have rhythm! – may opt for ballroom dancing or playing a sport like badminton or tennis together. For the less physically able, there are plenty of alternatives. You could both take up darts, which is a very sociable game played in public houses and social clubs and is growing in popularity among women. Online poker is fast becoming a popular hobby among men and women too, due largely to its ease of accessibility. There are online poker networks that have been in operation since the turn of the Millennium. One is even celebrating its 200 billionth hand dealt on its platform across cash games and tournaments.
Get creative with combining your existing interests
You may also wish to consider combining your existing hobbies. Perhaps you’re both fans of the snow and slopes, but one of you skis and the other snowboards. That doesn’t have to restrict you from enjoying memorable skiing holidays together. Similarly, if you are both football fans of different teams, why not go and watch each team together when they play at different kick-off times?
Don’t underestimate the importance of core values too
Shared interests do make a big difference to any relationship, but they must also be augmented with shared values too. If you and your partner have shared values, regardless of your interests, your relationship has a solid chance of staying the course. What values are we talking about? Core values will be underpinned by your upbringing and the beliefs inherited from both of your parents. Whether it’s career, political or lifestyle choices, if you are both able to make big decisions that you are comfortable with, you’ll stand a much better chance of lasting than a couple with differing core values that leave you feeling conflicted or short-changed.
Let’s face it, couples that grow old and grey together are those that have an emotional connection that’s as deep as it gets. Years after their children have been raised and have flown the nest, these couples are still attuned to each other’s emotional values. There will always be secondary values that may alter as life goes on, whether it’s wanting to become a vegetarian, developing a passion for animal rights or a different kind of politics. But at the heart of everything, a couple’s core values remain unaltered and unwavering in the face of everything that life throws at them. No shared hobby or interest is as important as that.