I know that you’ve been through this many times before and promised to yourself that it won’t happen again, that next time you will be strong enough to leave behind any toxic relationship, and yet, here you are again – falling head over heels for a man who is wrong for you.
I know that you want to believe that things will be different this time around. That he will be a changed man, but he is not. He is a wrong man for you, and he will end up breaking your heart again if you let him. You owe it to yourself to walk away from him before he does and makes you feel empty.
As for me, I’ve had my heart shattered to million pieces as well. And yes, I saw the pain coming but I didn’t do anything about it. I was going with the flow. I knew it in my heart that I must walk away from him, but I just wasn’t strong enough to do it.
I know how you feel. I’ve been there. I know why you are feeling that way. I know that he is or appears to be everything you’ve ever wanted a man to be. He was romantic. He took you out on dates. He kissed you while holding your hand. He said all the things you secretly wanted to hear. He seemed genuine and sincere. He gave you compliments, valued your opinions, admired your intelligence and personality, and made you feel amazing in every way.
Until suddenly, everything changed. He started showing his true colors. He built you up so high only to knock you down without warning. And when the bad times start outnumbering the good, then you know it’s time to stop and reconsider the relationship.
And when you start thinking about whether to continue with the relationship or put an end to it, I want to remind you that if you have to question it, then probably there is something wrong. Plus, should I remind you of what it feels like to get your heart broken? Did you forget the agonizing and all-consuming feelings of being played by the man you love?
You feel uncertain. You feel anxious. You don’t know whether he is ignoring you because he is really busy or he is ignoring you on purpose because he doesn’t care about you. You start wondering whether he has met someone else and those feelings of insecurity are eating you from the inside. Even if you two are not officially in a relationship, this is wrong. You are dating, you’ve shared emotions, you’ve been intimate with each other. So, that “we are not officially together, so we are free to date other people” is bullshit.
Don’t justify behavior like this especially if it’s hurting you.
You have an honest and genuine heart. Don’t allow your good qualities to impair your judgment and allow him to take advantage of your kindness. Don’t think about the good times when he was all caring and loving. Rather, think about how he makes you feel NOW.
After all, it’s better to be alone than with someone who makes you feel sad, anxious, and taken for granted. The good and charming guy that you fell in love with in the beginning is gone. Accept that and move on.
Don’t repeatedly stick your hand in the same fire and expect to not get burned again. Don’t ignore the red flags and the signs that are cautioning you. Don’t settle for less than you deserve.
Protect yourself. Protect your heart. You owe it to yourself that much.