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There Is A Difference Between A Habit And A Relationship That Makes You Feel Alive

There Is A Difference Between A Habit And A Relationship That Makes You Feel Alive

Having history with someone and actually loving them is not the same thing. 

Just because you spend a lot of time with someone, just because you are used to them, it doesn’t mean you love them.

Habits are a tricky thing. They are that fine line between love and safety. 

Feeling safe with someone, getting used to spending time with them, escaping loneliness is not the same thing as having that good old crazy love. 

Spending your life with someone just because you’ve been together for so long and it makes sense are the wrong reasons to stay with someone. That way you just settle for something. Anything. 

And you deserve so much more than being stuck in a wrong relationship. 

You justify those bumps on the road by saying that they are just temporary. That it’s just a phase. You overlook those underlying problems, and you try to see the big picture. 

The thing is, those slight bumps on the road are not a phase. They have been going on for a while now and you begin to realize that that’s who your partner is. 

You begin to realize that you are not okay with your differences, that you are not happy and fulfilled.

It could be because you have different perspectives or priorities, or just because the spark is no longer there. Maybe you enjoyed that comfort zone for too long and forgot to invest in romance and mutual bonding. It happens. 

Some relationships are beyond repair. But we can get out of them and try to find the relationship that will make us happy and excited. 

The one that will not feel like a routine; one that will grow, be dynamic, and one that will make your heart skip a beat. 

Yes, one that will not necessarily feel safe, but one that you will invest in, one that will make you feel alive. 

Being stuck in the wrong relationship will take away so much of your time and energy, and by being stuck in a routine that dulls your senses – you may miss out on a much better person, a much better fit -both physical and spiritual. 

So what if all your friends are in a relationship? Are you really going to be with someone below your standards? Someone whose behavior is a cosmic warning sign?

If you force yourself to keep going, if you know there is no future, why waste your time?

If you carry all the weight, if you do all the work in a relationship, if you pretend to be happy, then it means you need to let go of the slow poison you inject yourself with every day and take a leap of faith. 

Prolonging the inevitable will not make the breakup less difficult, but it will take away more of your time. 

We get the love we have the courage to ask and fight for. Think about that before settling down. Fresh perspectives may just bring new beginnings. 

Nora Connel