Two weeks ago I lost my beloved cousin. He died of leukemia at age 26. His parents were devastated. During those first days, I exchanged text messages with his sister about the memorial service and suddenly she interrupted our conversation with two very sobering words – This sucks.
And those two words contained all the reality of the situation. They perfectly explained the loss.
It is terrible. Devastating. A nightmare. It sucks.
When you lose a loved one, everyone tells you that they love how strong you are. And they say that with the greatest affection, but you know you are not strong. You know you are breaking inside.
You are SURVIVING.
Your world has crumbled down. You lost someone you loved with all your heart and there’s an emptiness inside you that cannot be filled.
Many people make the mistake of telling you how strong you are, not realizing that you are doing everything you can to put a mask on and act normal even though nothing feels normal to you.
So, this goes to everyone who is living with the loss of losing someone that meant the world to them – I am you.
I know what’s like to act that you are okay every day.
Because your reality sucks.
And the pain is unbearable.
So, no – you are not strong. You are surviving from the tragedy that has happened to you.
You are not strong in that vulnerable position. You are suffering. You are grieving.
The pain is real.
But you’ll survive.