Every person I talk to about modern dating seems to have the same feeling: Relationships have become very difficult. It appears as if no one wants to commit anymore. It appears as if no one is looking for something serious. Something real.
Perhaps the dating apps are to blame for this. Or perhaps the fact that we have a huge amount of choices available to us.
Whatever the reason may be, relationships have become a challenge in the world of modern dating, and here is why this might be so:
1. We’ve all been hurt before.
We’ve all had our hearts broken. We’ve all loved someone dearly and allowed our love to break us. This means that pretty much every person you meet will have emotional baggage. They might have been hurt only once, but now they are thinking that every relationship will bring them the same pain and disappointment. So, they settle for casual relationships instead.
2. Dating is no longer dating.
Dating isn’t what it used to be. These days, if someone asks you out on an official date, you probably won’t know it since it will be called “hanging out” – a term that has more than one meaning.
For example, it could mean that they want to be friends with you, or that they want to begin a relationship with you, or that they just want to sleep with you. And you only have to try to read their mind so as to figure out their intentions and then pray that you are right.
3. We are skeptical of love and relationships.
More and more relationships are failing. More and more marriages are ending in divorce. We are bombarded with depressing statistics about failed relationships that push us away from serious, real relationships. Most of us would rather avoid getting into a relationship with someone than risk getting our hearts broken.
4. No one is looking for a serious relationship at a young age.
They want to wear fashionable clothes and makeup in elementary school. They want to have casual relationships in high school. They want to roll solo for as long as possible in order to keep their options open. It appears as if no one wants to commit while they are still young.
5. We tend to follow specific rules.
We shouldn’t call them too much. We shouldn’t express our feelings too early. We shouldn’t sleep with them for the first few months. We are trying to follow specific dating rules, so even if we’re into someone, it is impossible to let that person know. In this way, we prevent ourselves from finding true love and developing something real.
6. A lot of people are obsessed with technology.
You can meet someone on Tinder. You can send messages to each other for months. You can even send them love messages or naked photos of yourself, and they still won’t ask you out on a real date. We’ve become too comfortable with modern technology. We would rather fall asleep next to our smartphone than another person.
7. We can’t rush things.
You know how they say: “Before you find the right person for you, you’ll have to kiss a lot of frogs.” Before you find your soulmate, you’ll have to have a couple of unsuccessful relationships first. And that’s okay. Because you can’t rush things. You can’t rush fate. No one can.
All you have to do is to be patient and believe that what’s meant to be yours will find its way to you eventually.