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It’s Not Your Fault You Got Hurt, But It Is Your Responsibility To Start Healing

It’s Not Your Fault You Got Hurt, But It Is Your Responsibility To Start Healing

You suffered a great loss. The loss of self. Your heart, your soul, your entire being.

You went through a heartbreak so painful that it took all of your hopes and dreams away from you. You were manipulated, humiliated, played with, and then abandoned. They shattered your heart and destroyed your entire world. Took away from you everything you held dear. They left you with traumas that will weigh you down for life. Scars that will always remind you of how painful your past was…

But I want you to know that none of that was your fault.

None of what you went through happened to you because you asked for it. You didn’t deserve any of those terrible experiences. You didn’t deserve the pain. You didn’t deserve to suffer. What happened to you was something you never imagined could happen. But regardless of it, it did. You got yourself in the place at the wrong time and BAM, you got hurt. And now you are here.

You are here all alone by yourself, struggling to make a move forward. Doing whatever you can to erase your memory of what they put you through. Trying so hard to not let pain drag you down that dark rabbit hole. Clawing to find a way out of that pitch-black maze that you are in. Doing your best to keep yourself sane.

You are here struggling to get your life together, but there’s something bigger than you that doesn’t let you… Something bigger that keeps reminding you of how you’ve lost. A voice that keeps whispering to you how nothing will ever be the same again…

And you are scared. You are scared out of your mind. You are terrified because you don’t want to live your life this way. You don’t know how much more you can take…

You know why? You are forgetting one very important thing.

In order to move on and finally start your own journey, you first have to face all of those demons inside of you. You have to face the ugly and start the healing process once and for all. You have to accept the pain as a part of you and let it flow through you as freely as water does. You need to look yourself in the mirror and say, “This is me. I am broken, hurt, lost, and confused, but I will find a way to get myself out of this mess!”  

The trauma that you’ve endured may not have been your fault, but healing is your responsibility. It is the least you can do for yourself after such agonizing, life-changing experiences. It is your responsibility to take the first step into the unknown. To face those deeply hidden parts of yourself that you are so afraid of and rise. To abandon your fears and rise into love. To work through the painful memories and bring light into your life.

To change. To transform. To evolve. To grow.

Sitting around waiting for those feelings to just fade away won’t do anything for you. It won’t take the pain away. It won’t give you your peace back. It won’t change your life. It will only make it more painful and even more miserable.

In the end, you have to remember one thing. We were not brought here to go through life unscathed. We were not put on this ship to enjoy the smooth seas. Because it is not about the destination. It has never been about that.

It’s always been about the journey. How it changes you, how it scars, how it hurts you, how it inspires you, how it motivates you… And most importantly, how you react to it…

So, what is it going to be? Will you be the hero or the victim of your story?

Stephanie Reeds