My first reaction was, “What do you mean? There’s no difference between those two. They’re the same thing.”
Now, I know what you’re thinking. And I’m sure you’re confused. How can you love one person if you’re not in love with them?
Our conversation continued, she explained herself to me, and my confused look suddenly transformed into a smile.
Because I remembered.
Suddenly, everything came back to me.
I remembered the moment our eyes first met. In those few seconds, it felt like my all my life was turned upside down and I couldn’t move, nor breathe. It was as though time ceased to exist and we were the only two people left in the world.
I vividly recalled standing next to you, talking to your ear and smelling your perfume for the first time. The scent of your skin combined with the intoxicating smell of your cologne drove me crazy. That was the first time I felt those fluttering butterflies in my stomach.
I remembered our first date. Your touch on my skin electrified my whole body. Your kiss on my cheek made me blush. Those possible scenarios of you and me triggered a tingly feeling in my gut. And I floating on 7th heaven.
That is how I fell in love with you. Everything we shared with each other, all of those moments we experienced together, those laughs, tears, hugs, kisses, embraces, sighs, words, moves made me fall for you.
But, as time passed, I got to know you better than before. It felt like with every tear, every experience, every laugh, and every challenge we shared, we were becoming closer than ever.
When I felt your sorrow, I wanted to hold your hand forever and let you know that nothing lasts forever. I wanted to wrap myself around you and give you everything you craved for. I wanted to be your remedy.
When you said that you’ve been hurt a lot in the past, the only thing I wanted to do was to become that person who can be your shelter from the cruel, cruel world.
When I sensed your amazing energy, your joy, and happiness inside of your heart, I was the happiest person alive. Because seeing you smile was the only food my soul ever needed. It made my heart sing.
In those moments, whether they were sad or happy, I only wanted one thing.
To be by your side and remind you just how much you mean to me.
To show you that I will always be here for you.
I found myself trying to come up with new ways to make you feel loved, let you know that you deserve everything in this world, take care of you until you feel better to stand up on your own feet, and express my innermost feelings to you.
And it was exactly in those moments that I finally realized that I was done falling in love with you because I already loved you.
My friend smiled at me and said, “Now you understand what I was talking about.”
Falling in love and being in love are two completely different things. They may sound like the same thing, but the intensity of those feelings is exactly what makes them so different from each other.
Falling for someone is that sweet, temporary infatuation, that incredible attraction and those crazy butterflies in the tummy that make us feel nauseous, but at the same time excited.
But, loving someone means completely devoting your soul and heart to another human being. It means that you are ready and willing to love this person for all eternity and stick with them through thick and thin.
This is how I know that I am not crazy in love with you, I just love you.
All of you. Today. Tomorrow. Forever.