I know what’s like. I know the painful, almost-gut wrenching feeling of wanting to help a person who’s going through another depressive episode, but not being powerful enough to really understand what they’re going through.
I know exactly how it feels. I can still feel the fear inside of me. The fear of leaving them alone in their room after a long talk, the fear of waking up to an empty bed, the fear of not seeing them another day… I know it all…
Last year, my brother was diagnosed with depression. We had a long, difficult and challenging journey ahead of us, but we made it.
And all I can say is this…
Depression is real people. It is a fricking nightmare. It is your worst fears combined together haunting you for the rest of your life. Depression is a serious mental condition that has affected many people’s lives. Some more fatally than others…
So, this goes to all of you going through the same pain…
I don’t know if this article will help you. But what I do know is that we need to make sure that this is something that people can openly talk about. It sounds stupid to even say this, but we have to normalize asking for help. Depression shouldn’t be a taboo subject. Depression is not a joke…
So, let’s talk about it.
Here are 10 ways to reach out when you are struggling with depression:
1. “I don’t want to be alone right now.” It is okay to feel lost and confused or unsure of what you really need right now. Still, it shouldn’t discourage you from reaching out to the people who love you. No matter what it is that you need right now, make sure to always communicate it with the people around you. Especially when you are hurting…
2. “I’m struggling and I can’t seem to help myself, no matter what I do. I really want to talk to you right now.” Dealing with depressive episodes can be truly tarrying and exhausting. But that doesn’t mean that you have to go through it on your own. Don’t be afraid to ask for help when you feel like it. And make sure you always set a time. This way you’ll let your loved ones know the urgency behind your call.
3. “I am afraid. Can you stay with me until I calm or fall asleep?” I know it’s hard to be so open and so vulnerable in front of someone. But nothing could be more important than your safety and your wellbeing.
You may also consider talking to a loved one about having a ketamine nasal spray on hand. This type of medication has been known to help calm down individuals experiencing severe depressive episodes. Remember, it’s okay to take medication if it helps you.
4. “It’s really hard for me to take care of myself. I could really need extra support right now.” Maybe you need a talk, or you just want someone to keep you company and take a walk with you to the park. Whatever you need help with, don’t hesitate to ask for it. It is okay to need support, especially when that’s the only thing that can make a difference in your life at the moment.
5. “I feel really bad about myself. Could you remind me of something cheerful, a memory that we both shared together?” I remember doing this with my brother. In fact, I remember doing this with a few of my friends as well. Back then, I perceived it as reassurance, fishing for compliments, validation… But now I see it. Sometimes a nice little reminder of a good time spent together is the only thing that can help a person get back on their feet and survive another day.
6 “.I know that I don’t talk so much, but that’s just how I feel. Is it okay with you if I call you when I feel like it?” Once again. It’s okay. It’s perfectly fine if you don’t feel like you can reach out for help in the exact same moment when you experience a depressive episode. You don’t have to if you don’t feel like it. So, take your time. But please, whatever you do, be honest about how you feel. Don’t bottle up your emotions.
7. “I have suicidal thoughts. I need you.” Sound the alarm, my friend. When you feel like you don’t have the strength and will to carry and on, cry for help. Scream. Shout from the rooftops. Call your loved ones. Let them know that it is an emergency and you are going out of your mind. But please, whatever it is that you choose to do, give people a chance to help you. Give them a chance to pull you out of that dark maze that you are in.
You, my dear, deserve to be happy.
So, please. Let this be a reminder that it is never too soon or too late to call someone, anyone and tell them how you really feel.
Depression is real and it kills. Don’t be afraid to reach out for help.
