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You’re Not A Real Man If You’re Stringing Her Along And Wasting Her Time

If you are not ready to make her your priority, leave her alone. Don’t waste her time. Don’t make her an option. Don’t chase her and try to manipulate her by making her feel like what you two have is real. Don’t play mind games. Don’t use her so that you can feel better about yourself after breaking up with your ex. She doesn’t deserve to be a rebound; not to you, not to anyone.

If you are not ready to be in a committed relationship, don’t string her along. Don’t try to know her better. Don’t make her feel close to you. Don’t open up to her and have her open up to you as well if you are not ready to respect her and her feelings. If you are not ready to love her, don’t make her fall in love with you. It is cruel.

If she is not your first choice, don’t try to get her back when she distances from you. Don’t try to fool her with your fake words and promises to keep her in your life. That’s selfish. Don’t kiss her and hold her hand if you are not planning to love her the real way.

If you are not ready to be with her, just leave. Walk away from her and let her find her happiness elsewhere. Don’t act jealous when you see her with someone else. Don’t try to get her back only to treat her like an option again.

 First Choice

If you are not willing to make her yours, stop wasting her time. Don’t half-love her. Don’t lie to her. Just leave because she doesn’t need half-you. She needs a mature and whole person beside her. Someone she can count on. Someone she can love and who will love her more than anything.

Leave her alone if you are not ready to be with her because she will leave you when she realizes that you are stringing her along. She will leave you when she realized that your presence feels the same as your absence and that she is better off alone.

This woman is the kind of woman who is looking for real love and commitment. She believes in being faithful and committed to one person. She is someone who loves hard and deep. She wants all or nothing.

Therefore, if you are having second thoughts about her, always choose to leave her. She will be grateful for that.

Make Time For God Because He Loves You And He Is Always There For You

Log off from your Fb and Instagram profile for an hour. Don’t respond right away to that call. Turn off the tv. Cancel your plans for the rest of the day and just sit still. Find your quiet place and spend some time with God. God loves you very much, cares about you, and He has many things to say to you. He will calm your anxious mind and make you listen to your heart.

Always make time for Him regardless of your busy schedule. Because He also makes time for you. You could never feel His presence or hear His words if you are in a constant hurry. 

All the outside noises and disruptions are only keeping you away from Him, your God who loves you.

If you are reading this now you probably are aware of how much you are blessed by Him. He has given you life, ears to hear, eyes to see, a heart to feel, a brain to be aware and understand.

God knows the real you, and He loves and values you immensely. He knows what makes you happy. He knows what makes you cry. He knows what makes you angry. He knows how you feel at any particular time. He knows your fears. He knows your strong and weak sides.

Therefore, make time for him Because He is waiting for you. Always.

You can pray or you can just sit still. You can cry or laugh when you tell Him what happened to you during the day. You can do whatever feels natural to you because God always knows what you want to tell Him even before you tell Him.

God knows the real you. He knows who you were and who you will become. And the more you get to spend time with Him, the more you’ll start hearing His voice.

You are loved. Your unique, extraordinary, lovable, yet flawed soul is so loved by God. And He wants you to let Him in by making time to be alone with Him.

5 Tips to Help You Break the Ice on a First Date

Going on a first date can be a nerve-wracking experience, especially if you’re not sure what the first words out of your mouth are going to be. Unfortunately, the longer you think about what you’re going to do next, the more awkward the situation can become. On the other hand, not saying much at all isn’t a good move, either.

Sometimes, it isn’t what you say or do, it’s how you approach the date in terms of appearance and demeanor that matter the most when it comes to positioning yourself to break the ice. If you can set the tone and create a positive initial impression through visual and social cues, then you don’t have to come up with the coolest or funniest things in the world to say, as you can lean on the preconceived image that you’re already projecting. With that said, here are five effective tips you can use to break the ice more easily on any first date:

1. Wear the Right Footwear and Clothing

While you might be hoping to find someone who “loves you for you” and doesn’t care how you dress, the real world usually doesn’t work like that on a first date. In fact, numerous dating and social surveys have revealed that people base their initial opinions and perceptions of others primarily on their outer appearance, which is mostly influenced by the shoes and clothing you’re wearing and how well-groomed you are. Of course, you’ll probably get a warmer welcome if you’re wearing a brand new pair of Givenchy sneakers than if you were to show up sporting decrepit ice fishing boots from your storage shed – after all, we’re not literally trying to break ice (frozen H2O). Why not check out SSENSE and see what designer pieces catch your eye?

2. Use Fragrances in Your Favor

Science has proven that pheromones and other natural scents are cues that the body uses to attract mates. While you don’t want to go back to the caveman times and utilize your body’s natural stench, you can still leverage the same concept by choosing an appealing cologne or perfume. There have also been social experiments done where people who had neutral or offensive odors were treated worse than people who had an attractive scent. However, be careful not to overdo this tip, as excessive fragrances could nauseate or annoy your date.

3. Don’t Talk Too Much

Your goal is to break the ice a bit, not completely melt it into a boiling lake of awkwardness. Don’t put yourself in the hot seat on purpose with long drawn out lectures. Try to think of breaking the ice like ice fishing: you put a line out there and wait a bit to see how the fish respond – you don’t just keep throwing lines out all willy-nilly. To bring the analogy even further, one properly placed line is all it really takes to put your catch on the hook. In more basic terms, the more you talk, the more likely it is that you’ll say accidentally something stupid or offensive, so try to keep your opening lines and responses short and sweet.

4. Choose the Right Setting

No, we’re not talking about your smartphone settings here. Instead, we’re talking about the environment in which the first date takes place. Naturally, it’s harder to break the ice in some places than it is in others. To build upon the previous analogy, you don’t want your date to take place in a frigid area where breaking the ice will feel like chipping away at Antarctica with an ice pick. Instead, you want to choose a warm and welcoming temperate zone that will ignite a heat wave which softens the ice just enough for you to gently break through it. In general, “warm” places are secluded, serene, peaceful, or entertaining, whereas “cold” places are crowded, hectic, noisy, or boring.

5. Be the First to Open Up or Ask a Question

You don’t want a horde of crickets standing in your way when you’re trying to break open the ice with a shovel. In case you’re socially clueless, “crickets” is the term used to describe that horrible void of silence that happens when neither person can think of something to say or muster up the courage to say it. Thus, the first step to breaking the ice properly should always be to clear the crickets out of the way. Of course, in the real word, you’d probably never encounter a horde of crickets swarming atop an ice sheet, but hey, you get the point – somebody’s got to be the big enough person to open up or start the discourse. You should never feel hesitant during this step because, in all actuality, your date expects you to say something, so don’t let them down.

Be Ready to Answer Questions, But Not Over-Eager

Eventually, after a few dates you can cut loose and not really give too much thought to how you’re answering questions, but for the first date it’s always best to look at it like a job interview – try to sound good without disqualifying yourself. When it comes to answering questions, sometimes less is more. You don’t want to be that person who tells their entire life story when someone asks them what kind of restaurant they want to eat at.

6 wedding blessings, prayers, and readings you will love

The order of the wedding is one that is meticulously planned, to make the day a fulfilled one. But while planning, three essentials must be present — wedding blessings, wedding prayer and wedding readings. These three items each have their importance to the couple, and you have to get it right. While you can borrow already made ones, there’s also space for leaving your touch, by writing your own.

Whichever choice you make, see our lineup of prayers, readings, and wedding blessing ideas below. If you are the hopelessly romantic type, you’ll also find unique wedding poems for your delight. They are either religious, romantic or traditional to suit your preference!

The Wedding Readings

Wedding blessing readings are sweet and heartfelt words that distill your relationship. Readings are sourced from different materials like the holy book, literature, movies, music and more. They can also be written by you if you intend to personalize it. With this, we’ve rounded up examples of wedding readings. Get inspired, whip out the cute diary from your bride’s box, and put something down.

  1. Ecclesiastes 4:9-12

Two are better than one,

because they have a good return for their labor:

If either of them falls down,

one can help the other up.

But pity anyone who falls

and has no one to help them up.

Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm.

But how can one keep warm alone?

Though one may be overpowered,

two can defend themselves.

A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.

  1. By Rumi

May these vows and this marriage be blessed.

May it be like sweet milk,

this marriage, like wine and halvah.

May this marriage offer fruit and shade

like the date palm.

May this marriage be full of laughter,

our every day a day in paradise.

May this marriage be a sign of compassion,

a seal of happiness here and hereafter.

May this marriage have a fair face and good name,

an omen as welcome,

as the moon in a clear blue sky.

I am out of words to describe

how spirit mingles in this marriage.

 

The Marriage Blessings

Marriage blessings are more-or-less wedding wishes to the couple. The bulk of them is religious and traditional because they are well-grounded for generations. If you’re coming through wedding blessings quotes or texts, see some suggestions here.

  1. From The Church of England

Blessed are you, O Lord our God,

for you have created joy and gladness,

pleasure and delight, love, peace, and fellowship.

Pour out the abundance of your blessing upon the bride and groom in their new life together.

Let their love for each other be a seal upon their hearts

and a crown upon their heads.

Bless them in their work and in their companionship;

awake and asleep,

in joy and in sorrow,

in life and in death.

Finally, in your mercy, bring them to that banquet

where your saints feast forever in your heavenly home.

We ask this through Jesus Christ your Son, our Lord

who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit,

one God, now and forever. Amen.

  1. By Dave Willis

May your marriage always bring glory to God, joy to one another and blessings to your family for many generations to come. May love and laughter fill your hearts and your home for all at the days of your lives. May you face every challenge hand-in-hand and side-by-side knowing that with God’s grace, you’ll conquer all obstacles together. May the world be forever a better place because the two of you fell in love. In Jesus’ name, Amen

The Wedding Prayers

Prayer for the wedding ceremony is the blessing of your union. This is very important if you intend to honor your faith and connect it to something spiritual. Wedding prayers are full of positivity and suit any wedding. They aren’t always religious, as you’ll see below.

  1. By Max Lucado

Would you take these two,

of dust and bone,

Born of flesh, then you,

Would you make them one?

Would you speak again

The words you spoke

When Adam slept

And Eve awoke?

Would you let your wine

Replace our water.

And look with grace

On this son, this daughter?

Oh Lord of Eden

In your majesty

Create again

Your tapestry

One heart

Where there were two.

This is the prayer

We lift to you. 

  1. By Robert Louis Stevenson

Lord, behold our family here assembled.

We thank you for this place in which we dwell,

for the love that unites us,

for the peace accorded us this day,

for the hope with which we expect the morrow,

for the health, the work, the food,

and the bright skies that make our lives delightful;

for our friends in all parts of the earth.

Wedding blessings, prayers, and readings have been given in this post. Borrow or use them as templates for your wedding.

It’s Your Fault That She Left. Now, Nothing Will Make Her Come Back

How could you let her go? How could you fail to see everything that she was giving to you? How could you not see all the love that she had for you? How could you be blind to all the times she was desperately holding onto you and the relationship fighting with all her might to make it work? How?

According to you, she was desperate. She was suffocating you with all her love and care. “I don’t need another mother”, you said. Her empathic personality has become a problem for you to deal with. It was easier to blame her and dismiss her wonderful personality than having to step up to the plate yourself and be a better man for her.

First, you drained her out of all the positive energy and then you had the audacity to tell her that ‘she is crazy’ and that ‘you can’t recognize her anymore.’

I think I can understand what your problem was. You couldn’t be with a woman who constantly pushed you forward and out of your comfort zone to be a better man. She wanted you to live up to your potential while you were fine living your mediocre life.

Unlike you, she saw the potential. She knew that you two could work it out if you made the effort. She was sure that it was all worth it. You, on the other hand, ceased to make the effort and started looking outside of the relationship for temporary pleasure. Why? Because you weren’t able to handle how ‘serious’ and ‘real’ the relationship started to become. You wanted something easy, something casual, something drama-free.

And while you may be telling yourself that you were always a ‘gentleman’ who did everything that he could to make her happy, you know deep in your heart that this is not true. The only thing you did flawlessly was finding the perfect way to escape from the responsibilities of the relationship and leaving her with questions, insecurities, and heartbreak.

You got her to a point when she was hurting and bleeding while trying to heal you and bandage your wounds from the past. And even though she was doing all that to help you, you were throwing excuses and lies at her until she couldn’t take it anymore.

And no matter how many times you succeeded in bringing her back after tearing her apart, the damage in her heart was still there. And one day, it turned into something you could see for yourself – indifference.

Suddenly, she had so much pain inside of her heart that she had to let it go together with her love for you. 

And it’s your loss, really. You lost a strong woman, a genuine woman who truly loved you and was always there for you. Now she is gone and you will have only yourself to blame because she is never coming back.

The Right One Will Enter Your Life When You Are Living It As If You Are The Love Of It

The Right One Will Enter Your Life

The “right” one… Many of us are still looking to find that person with whom we will spend our life. The one who will be our friend, lover, confidant, our biggest supporter, the one who always motivates us, is kind to us, and loves us with all their heart. The one whose soul is as our soul.

But, what if “the one” never comes? What if you were able to look at your future and see that you won’t find true love ever? What then? What would you do differently in your life? What choices you would make?

Yes, I know that if you are like me, probably that information won’t change anything crucial because your life is not influenced by someone’s presence or absence thereof. The mere idea that I will meet my soulmate and then everything will fall into place didn’t stop me from loving myself and focusing on living my best life. Because I realized that I am already a whole person and I deserve to create the life I want to be living regardless of whether I am with someone or not.

I pay my own bills, I love my job, I have many hobbies and friends, I travel a lot, and I spend my free time learning new things and growing as a person. I put more effort into appreciating the relationships I already have in my life, the ones with my friends and family and I enjoy spending time with them.

I was raised to believe that my goal in life should be finding love, getting married, and having children. But, having broken free from that belief was the ultimate liberation for me. When I stopped being scared of ending up alone, many windows of opportunities opened up for me. I mean, I could live anywhere I want in the world, get the degree I always wanted to have, travel to the places I always wanted to visit and not worry whether my decisions will affect someone else’s life. Because sometimes, love, as wonderful as it is, can hold us back from doing the things we want.

When we stop looking to find the love of our lives, we have all the time in the world to focus on ourselves and become our own loves. We can pamper ourselves, challenge ourselves, and build ourselves up to the best version of ourselves. We can become our own soulmates.

Stop waiting and searching for “the one.” If it’s meant to find them, it will happen. Until then, focus on yourself and live your life freely, confidently, as you are the love of it. Instead of waiting for “the one” – be “the one” for yourself!

I’ve Finally Learned To Let Go Of Anyone Who Doesn’t Value Me

I’ve Finally Learned To Let Go Of Anyone Who Doesn’t Value Me

I am a giver. I am a fighter. I am someone who has been taught to fight for the people and things I love. During my whole life, I believed that if I made a connection with someone, I should fight for it and do everything to keep that person in my life. How wrong I was…

I naively thought that every person in my life deserved to be there. I kept giving my all to them and kept ending up empty, brokenhearted, and utterly betrayed. And the saddest thing is, I was doing this to myself. I was betraying and destroying me because I couldn’t let go.

I just couldn’t accept the fact how the people I loved the most could hurt me just like that instead of loving me back. Why would someone reject all the love and care I was giving to them?

After many, many heartbreaks, and lonely nights spent in tears, I finally got it. You can’t change people. You can’t make them love you or appreciate you more.

In the process of being nice to others and making them love me, I lost myself. I forgot to love myself and be there for me. Because, at the end of the day, we are all alone. And when someone turns their back on us, we only got ourselves. And that should be enough. We are enough.

We must be our own heroes and not expect anything from anyone. We must be complete and whole on our own. We must guard our hearts ferociously because if we don’t, no one would.  

I am proud to say that I’ve finally let go of people who didn’t value me. I have also learned that just because you love someone, it doesn’t mean that they love you back or are good for you. Just because you want someone in your life doesn’t mean that they deserve to have a place in your life and heart.

I’ve finally learned that I deserve more than someone who constantly hurts me and lets me down. I have faith in me and my future that I will find someone who will see my true worth and be there for me. Someone who will reciprocate my love and my effort. Someone who will treat me the way I deserve to be treated.

I am no longer think less of myself just because someone didn’t see my worth. I am just walking away from them and releasing them from my life and my energy field.

I’ve finally learned to let go…

I Am Happy With My Single Life And I Stopped Looking For Love. This Time I Am Letting Love Find Me

Lately, it seems to me as if all my friends suddenly got into relationships. Some out of love, some out of not wanting to be alone, someone because of fear that time is passing them by, and it is time to find someone. Don’t get me wrong, I am happy for them. If a relationship is what it takes for them to be happy, then excellent.

As for me, I am single as a Pringle. And I am perfectly fine with it. Finally, after many, many years of being single, I can sincerely say that I have not been happier with my singleness than I am now.

Yes, I am happy and fulfilled with my life as it is now. I wouldn’t change anything. I am not saying that everything is perfect, but I stopped obsessing over things and expecting from people things I should first give to myself.

I stopped chasing after love because a love that you must chase is not true love. That’s why I stopped looking for it and instead, I decided to live my life in the most beautiful way I know. Love is still the most precious feeling for me, but I decided to stop chasing it and instead, to enjoy my life and live it with an open heart.

There isn’t anything wrong with being single. There isn’t anything wrong with focusing on yourself and taking care of you. Knowing yourself. Accepting yourself.

I stopped looking for love because I want to heal my past wounds first. I want to explore new depths of me and follow my own destiny.

I stopped looking for love because this time, I am letting love find me.

I am opening my heart for the people who are meant to be in my life to enter. I am no longer searching for love because I began living my life without following rules and other people’s opinions about what I am supposed to do with my life.

I am no longer looking for love because I learned how to be whole on my own.

In my solitude, I found happiness. I learned to love myself. I regained my confidence.

Yes, true love is still something I desire to experience, but it is not my priority. Happiness is. Joy is. Health is. Loving life is.

Me, choosing not to focus on love doesn’t mean that I am disappointed in people or that I am scared of getting hurt. No. This decision means I don’t want to have just anyone in order to be in a relationship. I am looking for the real thing. I want to have something deep, meaningful, and long-lasting. I am done with temporary relationships and short-time pleasures.

My heart is open for love, but only the kind of love that is based on trust and respect.

Until that love enters my life, I will continue choosing myself every single day.

When Two People Who Are The Happiest Together Can’t Have Their Happily Ever After

We were not right for each other. I know it. But, I still want you to know that you hold a special place in my heart. I want to thank you for all we shared and all the memories. I want to thank you for falling in love with me and being there to catch me when I fell in love with you. I want to thank you for all the laughs we shared. I want to thank you for loving me for who I am and your understanding and support you were giving me every single day. Especially, thank you for always being there for me.

Even though we were very happy together, and even though at some point we were right for each other, our love had an expiration date. And somehow, we both knew we were never going to last.

When we finished our story, I couldn’t help but wonder about all the maybes and what-ifs in our connection. I couldn’t stop my heart from feeling pain. And I also couldn’t understand how two people who were perfect together can’t have their happily ever after. I knew all along that you are not the one I am supposed to spend my life with even though I wanted with every fiber of my being.

I didn’t know then, but I know now that sometimes love is not enough. When it is the real thing, you not only fall in love with the other person, but you also fall in love with yourself. When you are with your destined person, you fall head over heels in love with the person you are with them.

Because, we can love someone, and it can still not be right. We can care about someone so much, and yet they might not be the one. Our relationship might still not be long-lasting. And that’s okay. Because maybe all these relationships and love stories are our steppingstones towards falling more and more in love with ourselves. Maybe they lead us to the right thing where we can find our true happiness.

As for me, I refused to let go of someone who was making me happy and fulfilled because I forgot that I can and I am completely fine on my own. That I can be happy on my own. Because with you, I forgot how to love myself. I didn’t live my truth. I lost my authenticity. That’s why we were not meant to be. And sometimes, we have to let someone go, so as something better can come.

But even though we didn’t last long, I will forever carry you in my heart. Because you have changed my life. You have shaped me in the person I am today and for that, I am forever grateful.

Now I know that true love is finding someone who will let you fall in love with yourself first.

If You Want Real Love, Don’t Flaunt Your Relationship On Social Media

If You Want Real Love, Don’t Flaunt Your Relationship On Social Media” is locked If You Want Real Love, Don’t Flaunt Your Relationship On Social Media

In an Instagram world, full of bloggers and people living their “perfect” lives that they proudly flaunt by posting pictures and stories every day, we are prone to lose the touch of reality and our ability to distinguish what’s fake and what’s not.

Maybe it’s just me, but I think that by posting pictures of our lives, we are opening the door to our privacy and allowing other people in and in turn, our lives become centered on the opinions of other people. We become obsessed with impressing others that we forget about ourselves and what it is that we truly want.

By doing so, we are unconsciously missing out on people that may be good for us. People with big hearts who are loyal and want to find true love. We could be missing on them because we are not letting down our guard, we are not allowing anyone to come close enough to us where they can hurt us. We are pushing people away by being emotionally distant because society has taught us that it is the only way to survive and not having your heart broken repeatedly.

The truth is when you start dating someone, all the process of getting to know each other should be intimate and private (not in a sexual way). You should base your opinion of a certain person only by your own perception and judgment and not according to what other people tell you about them.

Because the truth is, we are not perfect. Every person has a past and has made mistakes along the way. We’ve all experienced pain and heartbreak, but we have different ways of dealing with it and protecting ourselves. We are different people and we want different things in life, and that’s why you should never look for approval from others. Do what your heart tells you to do.

And when it comes to dating, the best way is to date in silence. Don’t tell anyone until you get to know the other person well so that you will not make the mistake of letting other people’s opinions mislead you. Trust your own judgment. Even if you are wrong, at least you will know that you have tried your best and you’ll save yourself from regrets.

Date silently because the people outside are envious, judgmental, and cold enough to put out any fire that is burning around you two.

A real relationship is between two people. Period. It shouldn’t be between you, your partner, your friends, their friends, your family, their family, your ex, their ex, or Susan and Paul from Instagram.

So, give yourself time and space to choose wisely. And always, always follow your heart. Because when you date silently, the love between you is loud and clear. And when you date out loud, the love will soon be silenced.

Do Taller Men Make Women Happier?

Have you ever wondered why women prefer taller men? Of course, the main reason is that they can wear high heels anytime and anywhere, but one study suggested that women who were in a relationship with taller men were actually happier.

Is it true? Can a taller man make a woman happier?

One study from 2017 that included 7850 Indonesian participants said yes – the greater the height difference between the man and the woman is, the happier the woman will be. Of course, income has something to do with it because as it was found, taller people tend to have greater earning potential because they appear to be more confident, trustworthy and capable (3, 5).

Taller men are also seen as more attractive and they are generally more satisfied with their life (4, 6). Also, it is possible that women are genetically predisposed to like taller men because bigger men were better at hunting in ancient times and they want to feel ‘protected’ and ‘safe’ in their arms.

However, on the other hand, every person is different and there isn’t proof that shorter men cannot make women just as happy as taller men, especially if they are also attractive, happy, and successful.

Moreover, one 2010 study found that women don’t feel more valued or attractive when they are approached by a taller man as opposed to a shorter man.

After all, just look at the famous Hollywood couples like Nicole Kidman and Keith Urban, Chrissy Teigen and John Legend, Helen Lasichanh and Pharrell Williams, Behati Prinsloo and Adam Levine, and so on. These ladies seem to be very happy together with their shorter partners.

Finally, you shouldn’t let height determine the future of your relationships. Just go towards those who make you happy.

Sources:

  1. Sohn, K. (2016). Does a taller husband make his wife happier?. Personality and Individual Differences, 91, pp.14-21.
  2. Holmes, S. (2017). 19 Female Celebrities Who’ve Been With Shorter Men. [online] ELLE. Available at: http://www.elle.com/culture/celebrities/g26073/female-celebs-taller-than-boyfriends/ [Accessed 6 Nov. 2017].
  3. Sohn, K. (2016). Height and happiness in a developing country. Journal of Happiness Studies, 17(1), 1-23. doi:http://dx.doi.org/10.1007/s10902-014-9566-8
  4. Denny, K. (2017). Are the effects of height on well-being a tall tale? Journal of Happiness Studies, 18(5), 1445-1458. doi:http://dx.doi.org/10.1007/s10902-016-9785-2
  5. Persico, N., Postlewaite, A., & Silverman, D. (2004). The effect of adolescent experience on labor market outcomes: The case of height. Cambridge: National Bureau of Economic Research, Inc. doi:http://dx.doi.org/10.3386/w10522
  6. Swami, V., Tran, U. S., Stieger, S., & Voracek, M. (2015). Associations between women’s body image and happiness: Results of the YouBeauty.com body image survey (YBIS). Journal of Happiness Studies, 16(3), 705-718. doi:http://dx.doi.org/10.1007/s10902-014-9530-7
  7. Ludwig, Y. S., & Pollet, T. V. (2014). When men appear smaller or larger than they really are: Preliminary evidence that women are fooled by size illusions in attractiveness judgment tasks.Anthropological Review, 77(3), 299-329. doi:http://dx.doi.org/10.2478/anre-2014-0023
  8. Stambush, M. A., & Mattingly, B. A. (2010). When being liked makes us dislike ourselves: Self-rated attractiveness as influenced by an attractive or unattractive other’s romantic interest in the self.North American Journal of Psychology, 12(2), 341-354. Retrieved from https://proxy.library.mcgill.ca/login?url=https://search.proquest.com/docview/325150812?accountid=12339

Take All The Time You Need To Heal Your Heart And Feel Like Yourself Again

We, human beings, are not made of stone. We have feelings and oftentimes our feelings get hurt. We all have experienced incredible sadness and we still crumble down and drown in sorrow. But, it’s during those times that we learn how to embrace our emotions.

Be angry. Be sad. Cry. Let your emotions out. They are there to remind you how you shouldn’t be feeling. Your emotions are there to humble you and break your heart so that it can open for new experiences and better things.

I also went through an emotional rollercoaster. The person who I thought loved me broke my heart. I was devastated. I never thought I could move on with my life. I realized that they never cared about me and what they could get from me. I was only a temporary convenience and they never planned on loving me the way I deserve to be loved.

And I think that this realization was what hurt me the most – when I found that I was not what they wanted. And that is okay. Now, I understand that I can’t be good and wanted by everyone I love. I can’t force someone into loving me. I can only control myself and my feelings.

During moments of deep pain and sadness, it is essential to do small things that make you happy. Go out with your friends. Buy yourself something. Book tickets for your next trip. Anything that will make you happy. Moreover, surround yourself with positive people who will make you forget all the pain that is in your heart. People who will make you smile again and show you that life is beautiful. Hold on to those people.

And never, never feel guilty for taking the time you need to heal and make yourself feel okay again. Everyone has a different pace in life and everyone’s healing is different. The only thing that you should remember is to be patient and know that good things come to those who wait.

Why God Lets You Fall In Love With A Person And Then Takes Them Away

Why God Lets You Fall In Love With A Person And Then Takes Them Away

People often say to me that when you love someone, you can’t explain why you love them. It is a feeling that goes beyond all reasoning and planning. We rarely plan to fall in love. We just do. When we meet someone special, someone with whom we ‘click’ there is an instant connection and bonding that is happening between our souls.

Sometimes I feel that these soul-connections are given to us by God. I feel that God makes us meet certain people and allows them to become a vital part of our lives and change us to the core. These people are the ones who are destined to teach us the most valuable lessons about ourselves and the world.

When I look back, every person that has come into my life has come for a reason – to teach me something and shape me into the person I am today. And the interesting part is, these people were not meant to stay, they were only there to fulfill their mission and then leave.

Most of the time, it’s the stage of our lives we are in that determines the type of people that will connect with us. Because God always sends the right people at the right time and provides us with the answers we were looking for. He wants us to grow and become the best versions of ourselves and that’s why He sometimes brings challenging people that are meant to shake us to our core and inspire us to change.

The trouble is, when we fall in love with these people and our bond, we forget that they are only temporary and we don’t want to let go. So, we desperately try to make them our forever people even though they have fulfilled their mission and need to leave us. We just can’t understand why God would bring someone amazing into our lives and then take that person away.

And perhaps that’s the point. Maybe God is teaching us how to let go. Because after all, nothing is eternal. And in order for us to learn how to detach and accept that a certain story is over, we have to practice the art of letting go gracefully.

But most importantly, God is teaching us to have faith that one day we will meet someone who will be our forever.

Remember, Apologies Don’t Mean Anything – Actions Do.

Don’t say you are sorry for treating me badly and then going back to treating me the same way. Your apology doesn’t count if your behavior towards me remains unchanged. It’s empty and meaningless. And it is not a reflection on your maturity, because real maturity comes from recognizing your flaws and correcting them.

I will never feel guilty for walking away from you because you have hurt me. Yes, you apologized and said you regret doing so. But you did it again. And again. And again. You kept hurting me and that is something I won’t allow anymore. Everyone has permission to walk away from someone who continues hurting them.

If someone has my best intentions at heart and really loves me, then they will correct their toxic behavior because they wouldn’t want to see me in pain.

Of course, they won’t be perfect and flawless, but they are going to be willing to work on the things that are harming our relationship. Because there is a great difference between a toxic partner who is unwilling to change and someone who has good intentions and they love you but sometimes make minor unintentional mistakes.

Because there are people who were apologizing to me just because they knew that that’s what I wanted to hear, and they thought it was the easiest way out. Yes, their apology might have been sincere, but it turned out that they only treated me better for a short period of time and they ended up going back to their old ways.

This is a common tactic of emotional manipulators. They act like they are sorry for how they treated you because they want to lure you in their life again. Therefore, they sweet-talk you and give you an illusion that they are changed until you put down your guard and then they go back to being a**holes.

So, be careful when you accept apologies. Only give people second chances if you really believe that they are capable of working on themselves and bettering themselves. Don’t lower your standards and forget about your needs just so that you can have an excuse for keeping someone in your life. Don’t hurt yourself like that.

And remember, apologies don’t mean anything – actions do!

Therefore, don’t feel bad about walking away from someone who is not deserving of your time, love, and energy.

I Am Strong But I Still Need Someone To Hold My Hand

I am a strong person but I still need love. I need to have someone who will be there for me. Someone who will take my hand and tell me that everything is going to be okay. Someone who will take away all my fears and worries.

I am a strong and independent person, but sometimes I need a loyal person who will hug me and show me the meaning of true love. Someone who will feel like home to me. 

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