Men that are insecure hide their low, almost non-existent, confidence behind the veil of manipulation and emotional unavailability.
Their insecurities are things they could never show others. That’s why they try to hide their lack of confidence in every way they can and they show an unpleasant, egotistic behavior through manipulation.
The problem with insecure men is that they’re masters of deception. They walk into your life as these innocent, kind, and vulnerable individuals that are more than happy to show you all their insecurities and flaws.
However, after a while, and unfortunately, that’s usually after they’ve managed to steal your heart and get deep under your skin, you come to understand that their weaknesses and fears are the things that unleash a radically different persona. A selfish, inconsiderate, manipulative person that enjoys hurting other people.
So, to protect yourself from this kind of men, here are 6 most common devious mind games that insecure and emotionally unavailable men play in relationships:
1. They put you down.
They lift themselves up by putting you down. They point out your weaknesses, fears, and mistakes just to make you feel like you’re weaker and less important than them. They have no problem overly criticizing and shaming you in front of other people – they’re simply ready to do anything to make themselves look and feel superior to you and everyone else.
2. When you’re with them, you never know what version of them you’re getting.
They’ll be patient, compassionate, and affectionate one moment and they’ll show you their ugly, cruel side the next. They’ll tell you how happy and privileged they are for having you in their life one day only to tell you that they don’t know why they’re with you the next.
When you’re in a relationship with a person like this, you never know how they feel about you. You constantly doubt their love and you can’t tell where your relationship is headed.
So, if you’re in a relationship with this kind of man and you ever find yourself in this kind of situation, ask him to explain to you why he is behaving like that. If he really cares about you and wants to make your relationship succeed, he’ll tell you the reason for that and try to change his behavior, and even ask for your help to do it. But if he doesn’t, well, you should consider leaving him because that’s a sure sign he’s not in love with you.
3. They put the blame on you for everything.
No matter what problem you two are having, you’re always the one to blame. Insecure men always find a way to avoid taking responsibility for their own mistakes and wrongdoings and lay the blame at your door. They don’t care whether they’ll hurt your feelings by doing that because all that matters to them is to make themselves look flawless.
If you ever find yourself in this kind of situation, the best thing you could do is to face him right away. Call him out on his bullsh*t and bad behavior and let him know that you have no intention of taking responsibility for something that’s not your fault.
4. They don’t solve disagreements and arguments – they create more of these.
When this kind of man is having an argument, instead of solving it and trying to work out a solution to whatever problem you are having, he tends to create more problems and more drama. For example, he’ll bring up some old, almost forgotten, mistakes you made in the past. Or he’ll blame you for something that’s not your fault.
Of course, as he’s bombarding you with his accusations, you’ll start defending yourself, but after a while, you’ll get tired of this and end up taking responsibility for something you never said or did, which is his main goal.
If this happens to you, don’t back down if you know that there’s nothing he can blame you for. Let him know that you won’t let him manipulate you and guilt-trip you.
5. They act like douchebags.
When this kind of guy is alone with you, he’s kind and loving, but that sweet, charming side of his simply disappears once you go out to hang out with him and his friends. He turns into such an immature, irresponsible, conceited person that you even start wondering who that person is.
What you need to remember is that this is his way of hiding his weaknesses and fears because he feels like a better and more important person when he makes someone else feel week and inferior to him in public.
If you find yourself in a situation like this, make sure you let him know how you feel when he treats you that way. Don’t be afraid to stand up for yourself and let him know that you have no intention of putting up with his crappy behavior.
6. They never apologize.
Of course, they don’t. No matter how many times they break their promises, lie to you, or hurt your feelings, you’ll never hear them say: “I’m sorry.” Because, in their view, they’re perfect and they have nothing to apologize for.
Therefore, never wait for them to apologize to you for their hurtful words, mistakes, and bad actions. Because in this way, you’re only wasting your time.
And remember – you’re not obliged to tolerate anyone’s sick mind games. Although letting go of someone you love with every part of you is hard – sometimes that’s the best thing you can do so as to protect yourself from pain.
Should you have any questions regarding this topic or one of your own interest, feel free to email me at [email protected]