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10 Ways to Keep Your Marriage Together After Losing a Job

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Bad economy, layoffs, reductions in force, and business closures create job cutbacks that have a direct impact on the employees. Most of the time these job cutbacks aren’t personal and they have nothing to do with the efficiency and the work ability of the employee that they are letting go.

The companies say that they just need to minimize their costs, so as to increase the profit. But they never ask the price being paid for this so called “cost minimization”. And the price is tears, stress, no health insurance, divorces, break-ups.

People do take it personally, because when in marriage, when one has a family, they depend on that monthly income and then in a matter of seconds their whole life can be turned upside down.

It such difficult times one must remember that all happens for a reason and when one door closes another opens. Sometimes it takes time until we see the newly opened door and the window of new opportunity, but we only need to adjust our focus.

Though it may seem like you are going through hell, and you are, the bright side is that you don’t have to walk alone. And here are some useful pieces of advice that could help you get through these hard times.

  1. Reorganize your priorities – now the family budget is much shorter and you must reorganize your priorities. So if the family was used to long vacations, expensive toys and so on, all this luxury now goes away and you must pay attention to the necessities first. And there is nothing to be ashamed of. It is better to have food on the table and roof above the head than to feed false friends on lavish parties that would gossip you anyway.
  2. Strengthening family ties – in such times it is nothing more important than the family to stay together. Get to know each other, spend time with your family, not many parents even know what their children like doing. Use this time wisely to be with the ones you love and grow even closer to them.
  3. Keep up the communication with your spouse – don’t stop talking, don’t leave your spouse outside just because you are having a hard time. She/he could have a hard time too, but you must talk to each other. Communication eases the pain and gives you opportunity to tell and show your feelings and to know and understand the feelings of your family. Remember that they don’t have telepathic abilities to guess what you are going through. Express your feelings, shout if you must, but remember that communication is the only way to find solution for all problems.
  4. Get an expert’s help – don’t be too proud to ask for help. And this goes for whatever help you need. If you need an expert’s advice to settle your remaining financial resources, ask for it. If you need professional advice how to get a new job, or how to cope with your current situation, get it. Sometimes it is better to speak about your situation in front of a total stranger, than to release all your anger toward your spouse.
  5. Reassess you wealth – people usually own many things they don’t really need, or have never used them. In situations when the money inflow is cut off it might be a good idea to sell some stuff you hardly ever use, or make a garage sale for the stuff you did use, but you don’t need them anymore. The bills won’t stop coming, so you must think of something creative to raise enough money.
  6. Be grateful – you can use this situation to learn how to appreciate the things that you do have. When people have money, job, little or more luxury, they tend to overlook the real treasure they have – their family. So be thankful and grateful for the things you still have and try not to lose them too.
  7. Be your own best friend – you don’t need to put yourself down in a situation where you cannot possibly change anything. You lost your job and this is an unchangeable fact, but now you need to stay positive and start looking for a new one. It won’t fall out of the sky, you know. So chin up and start encouraging yourself enough to go and get a new, well deserved, job.
  8. Connect with others – to stand back on your own two feet you’ll need professional help, but you’ll need friends much more. So don’t sit at home waiting for a miracle, go outside, communicate, listen to your friends and ask if someone knows something about a job opening.
  9. Don’t stress yourself out – you must understand the impact that stress makes on your health. If you are too stressed your health in general will surely suffer. And if you are sick you cannot go outside looking for a job. And if you don’t get a new job, you’ll feel even worse.
  10. Give yourself time – you were laid off, no need to panic. You can start looking for a new job the following day or the day after that, but in the meanwhile please have fun as much as you can. Enjoy in what you still have – time and family. So please use your time to heal together with your family.

Remember, even if you don’t believe it – everything happens for a reason. Maybe the reason is a new job, better paid, or with not so much stress. Or simply the Universe tries to tell you to take a break, because otherwise it would get worse.

Think about it – find the reason why this is happening to you and learn the lesson.

David Smith

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