Home Love & Relationships 10 Reasons Why You Keep Attracting Toxic Partners

10 Reasons Why You Keep Attracting Toxic Partners


I am sure that every one of us has been in a relationship with a toxic person that left us confused and wondering what the hell happened and how did we get involved in a situation like that.

Of course, they were the ones who were damaged, but we should ask ourselves whether we were doing something to attract them to us.

Well, if these 10 things bellow apply to you, then your behavior is probably drawing toxic people to you without you even realizing.

1. You Are Too Nice And Empathetic

You are always understanding and polite. You are very nice, caring, and forgiving. Maybe too much. You are someone who tends to justify toxic behavior by making excuses for it. So, you may catch yourself saying things like “Oh, they are so busy” or “They were so hurt in the past and that’s why they behave like this.” This makes you a perfect target for a toxic person who will use you as a doormat and will take advantage of your empathic nature.

2. You Are A Fixer

You are the kind of person who likes to fix people. Especially toxic ones. You are used to always be there for people however obnoxious they are. You say things along the lines of “If they aren’t such a … then things would be better between us.” The problem here is that toxic people rarely (if ever) change. They will always expect you to invest more in the relationship and do whatever they like.

3. You Give The Benefit Of The Doubt

You always try to see the good in people. You are master of finding good traits even in toxic people as well (or at least you want to believe they possess those traits). You give everyone the benefit of the doubt even when you catch them lying to your face. You are always willing to forgive and let go of the grudges for the sake of your relationships with people.  

4. You Don’t Value Yourself

You don’t love yourself enough and you don’t have much confidence in yourself which makes you the perfect prey for attracting a toxic partner into your life. You have low standards which makes you put up with their ugly behavior and that is a toxic person’s ultimate goal – to have someone who will put up with all their bullshit and not say a word.

5. You Are Their Hope Of Change

You are a decent and quality woman who leads a quality and healthy life. This is something that is alluring to toxic people, especially to those who are aware of their bad habits and want to change them. They think that your good nature will turn them into a respectable person, or so they wish.

6. You Are A Great Listener

If there is one thing that all toxic people love doing is talking about themselves. They can talk about themselves for hours. Which is why they are drawn to great listeners like you. People who are willing to give them the time of day and really listen to their boasting.

7. You Don’t Have Healthy Boundaries

You are always giving yourself to other people that you’ve become their martyr. You are willing to take on everyone’s drama and problems and offer them help while neglecting yourself and your own needs. This is also what is making you easy for toxic people to get to you. Your lack of boundaries makes them take advantage of you.

8. You Are Too Laid-Back And Easygoing

You are the type of person who doesn’t want to pressure others or put demands on them. You feel like if you put a pressure on the relationship that you’ll lose your partner. So, you take a laid-back approach and you let them take the steering wheel of your relationship. You go with the flow and tend to turn a blind eye to situations when a toxic person is overstepping your boundaries.

9. You Stay In Bad Situations Longer Than Necessary

A toxic person usually does their homework when it comes to finding how much crap you can put up with until you decide to leave. They’ll test your boundaries, and if they find that you are not able to leave a bad situation behind and cut ties with people who treat you badly – they will use this information to their advantage.

10. You Have Given Up On Love

Toxic people don’t want to be with a partner who has a healthy approach towards love because they know that that individual would cut them off quickly and won’t waste their time on them. They are very smart while they pick their victims and they usually pick those who seem like they’ve given up on love altogether and are in a low stage in life.

Mary Wright