Love is love. It is free, giving, fulfilling, bountiful, awarding, autonomous, free-flowing, and just. Love gives and love encourages. Love lifts and sets free. It never binds, nor does it cage. Love understands and love accepts.
To love means to really be there for another soul, to accept them fully, to cherish them, respect them and acknowledge as a part of your life without expecting them to give you anything in return. Without expecting them to love you back. That is freedom. And that is the only way love can exist.
Anything else that cages you, binds you and forces you to pretend to be someone you are not cannot be called love. People who act that way, people who feel the urge to entrap you and control your life because it gives them a sense of power do not love you. They don’t love you in any real way. They love possessing you and having you as their own.
There is a big difference between loving someone and being obsessed with someone.
Here are 7 signs that your partner may not love you as you think:
1. They do not respect your boundaries. They don’t care about your rules, your principles, your values and your opinions. The only thing they give a damn is getting what they want. And what they want is to possess you. To control you and get you to do whatever they want from you.
2. They are way too demanding of your attention. One day they seem like the most loving and committing partner alive, but the next day is a completely different story. If this is the case with your partner, know that they are probably not in for the love, but for the thrill of controlling you. It is one thing to want to see your partner as much as possible, but quite another to demand them to be around you all the time.
3. They are crazy jealous. So much that even the thought of you being out with your friends drives them crazy. This is a major red flag in the relationship and a serious sign that your partner not only doubts you, but also want to keep you as close to them as possible. A sign that they want you all to themselves.
4. They constantly lash out without even giving you a chance to explain yourself. It’s obvious. They have no idea how to communicate like a normal human being. The only way they talk to people is by yelling at them and making things awkward. If you are experiencing this in your relationship, I want you to understand that this is not love. This is not how a loved one should treat you. So, please stop justifying their behavior by saying “That’s just the way they are.”
5. They want to know where you are and what you do every single moment of your life. Being in control is what gives them pleasure. It makes them feel powerful. If they could, they would never let you out of their sight. People like this have one name. Control freaks. You should stay away from them.
6. They are very quick to make threats of harming you if you don’t follow their rules. This is truly alarming. And it goes without saying. If you by any chance are still in a relationship with someone like this, then I beg you, get the hell away from that person. People who have no problem making threats of harming you are very likely to eventually harm you, as well.
7. They never give you any space. Control freaks have a tendency to always be glued to their partners, no matter how their partners feel about it. These people don’t feel like they need to give you space and time to do whatever you feel doing. They don’t feel that you even deserve that. In their minds, your time has to be spent with them. Your space should involve them, always and forever. But that doesn’t mean that you should say yes to this. A toxic behavior like this should not be tolerated ever.
