There are days when I miss him so much. Days when he is all I can think about. He filled my heart with so many memories that I can’t forget.
There were times when his strong arms were always there to catch me and the only refuge I knew. During times of sorrow and pain, he was my home – a safe place to go whenever I needed to heal.
I loved him. I still do. But I remind myself constantly that I shouldn’t because he doesn’t feel the same about me.
He was my best friend. And I tried everything not to fall in love with him, but I failed. Even though I reminded myself constantly that I am his best friend and we will never be more than that – I couldn’t do it.
I was madly in love with him and I had to tell him. I had to confess my feelings to him because I felt that if I didn’t, I would go crazy. And just like I suspected, he said that he doesn’t have romantic feelings for me, but that I am his best friend and he doesn’t want to lose me.
Even though I felt completely lost and shattered, I told myself that I shouldn’t allow anything to destroy our friendship.
Yes, I love him. But I also love his friendship. And no matter how much it hurts seeing him flirting with other girls, I am not prepared to let him go even though I know that the situation will never change.
However, I am no victim, and he is not a villain. We can’t make someone love us. Sometimes, it is better to swallow your feelings and be their friend no matter how painful it is.
I am slowly accepting the sad reality that he will be with someone else sometimes. That he will be someone else’s star. And this thought breaks my heart in half.
But I’ll be okay. I’ll let him go. I’ll grow. I’ll follow my destiny and wish him all the best. Because some things are not meant to be. And maybe someday I’ll fall in love again.
