It’s really hard to open your eyes and see things clearly when you are madly in love. But, I guess it’s true what they say, after all… love is blind. It covers your eyes and your ears, and it only makes you feel things while you’re completely vulnerable and powerless.
I was so silly to fall for him thinking he was my soulmate. I was even sillier to believe his shallow promises. But, I guess I was so desperate for love that I really needed him to be the one to light my fire and show me the way.
You already know that this story doesn’t end well. And you probably know that he’s just a part of my painful past.
But, I feel that I need to rip open my soul in front of you and bleed on this keyboard. I need to do that for myself, or else the feeling I have inside of me will continue to haunt me.
I made him a priority in my life. He opened up to me. He made realize that his intentions are pure. He made me feel like I finally found what I was looking for in life. It was so easy for me to fall in love with him. He was everything I ever dreamed of.
So, just like that, we started building something special. Every minute we spend together made us feel more and more connected to each other. I was consumed by his passion and love like never before.
But, as the relationship progressed, things got complicated. It turned out that all good things eventually come to an end. I like to believe that we both had the best intentions when we got into this relationship. That’s what gets me through the day.
Because what he did to me… cannot be described with words.
He bailed on me. When I least expected. In the most horrible way, a person can imagine.
I know that our relationship wasn’t doing well, and I know that we were constantly fighting, but the realization that he left without saying a simple goodbye knocked me down. I didn’t even get the chance to tell him what I feel. He just disappeared and shattered my heart into thousand pieces.
Believe me, I know that I deserve so much better than this. I know that I need to put this behind me and move forward. I know that I shouldn’t blame myself for believing he was my soulmate.
But, it hurts so f*cking much… Why does it have to be so painful?
I hate myself for being wrong about him. I hate myself for not seeing his true colors.
This is the pain of realizing he’s not the one for me. It’s gut-wrenching. But, I won’t let it turn my heart into stone. I’ll never give up on love. As long as I live and breathe I will never stop searching for love.