She is distant, but she is also clingy. Sometimes, she will text you first, she will give you a compliment, she will send you a picture or a song that it reminds her of you. Sometimes it will feel like her love and warmth is overflowing from her soul and onto you.
And then, there are days when all she wants is to be left alone. Days when she turns off her phone and doesn’t reply to your texts. Days when she cancels on you because all she wants to do is stay at home and be by herself.
You see, she is a woman who can easily switch from clingy to distant and vice versa.
She is someone who is a giver. But she can also be selfish. Sometimes, she is all about helping others, holding doors open for total strangers, buying lunch to a homeless person, or just answering the call that comes up at 3 o’clock in the morning coming who a friend who has an emergency and immediately giving them a hand.
And then, there are days when she only cares about herself. Days when she acts completely disinterested and unbothered. Days when she decides she is the most important person and everyone else who tries to steal her energy can go and f*ck themselves.
She is a woman who is content on her own. But she is also lonely at times. Some days she feels happy spending time on her own, reading books, listening to music, or watching Netflix, and then there are days when she just snuggles in bed, staring at her phone and desperately craving for a connection with another human being.
She is the most independent person you’ll ever meet but also the loneliest at times.
She is lazy, but also a workaholic. Sometimes, she feels like she can’t leave her bed and go to work, when standing up and walking feels like too much work, and when she skips all of her morning routines just so that she can get one hour more for sleep.
However, other days, she is an unstoppable force. Days when she relies on her friend – coffee- and she pulls all-nighters without a problem. Days when she doesn’t give up until she finishes what she’s started. When she is in this phase, she accomplishes more things in one day than other people accomplish in a week. That’s how strong her willpower is.
And she is slowly learning that everyone is not always the same. Different people see different sides of us at different points in time. Nothing is ever permanent. We all change day by day.
We are not black and white. We are more complex than that.