Love – the force that makes the world go around. The inspiration for many writers and poets. The thing that some wait a lifetime searching for. When we find our missing half, our perfect partner, we plan to hold on to them forever. But, then why so many couples, whether married or not, decide to end their relationships.
They wrongly believe that their partner is not the right person for them. They separate once worries, doubts, and problems begin to get in the way of romance, not realizing that this is just one step to a deeper, genuine love. The thing is, all couples experience 5 stages of love. And the reason why so many couples separate is that they’re unable to persist past stage 3.
For your relationship to be meaningful, deep, and long-lasting, you need to reach all of them. Knowing this in advance can save you from going through future breakups and heartache, and give you the hope that whatever difficulties you and your partner come across, you can always overcome them.
Here are the 5 stages of love:
Stage 1: Passion and fun.
You meet the man or woman of your dreams and fall head over heels in love with them. You think about them all the time and love spending time together. You learn about each other’s experiences, interests, and attitudes toward life. You want to try things you wouldn’t normally try.
This stage is also known as the honeymoon stage. It’s all about flirting, excitement and passion. You feel butterflies in the stomach, your heart beats like crazy and your hormones run wild. This stage is like a fun game and it tends to be everyone’s favorite.
Stage 2: Getting serious and settling down.
You’re way past the infatuation stage. The love between you is becoming deeper and deeper. You become a couple and commit to each other. You still keep the romance alive, but something has changed. Maybe you’ve moved in together, or even got married and have kids.
Making love is still perfect, but it’s become more meaningful and profound. You feel cherished, cared for, and protected. And although adult responsibilities just keep piling up, this doesn’t keep you from enjoying love. In fact, you experience love at a whole new level. Now, everything makes sense. It feels like you’ve started a new journey in your life – a journey you want to last forever.
Stage 3: Disillusionment.
Unfortunately, this is the stage when many couples break up. Things begin to feel off. You’re stuck with your domestic responsibilities – taking care of your kids, paying the bills – a lot of things to worry about.
Everything has turned into a routine. You begin to wonder what happened to all those cuddles, kisses, romantic nights, and love feelings. You feel like your partner is taking you for granted. Unimportant things that you didn’t even notice before begin to annoy you.
Constant quarrels have taken the place of romance. You have mixed feelings which make you doubt if you made the right choice. You may even start resenting each other and want to call it quits. And sadly, that’s what most couples do.
Stage 4: A deeper understanding.
If you’ve passed stage 3, consider yourself safe. In this stage, all veils are stripped away. You begin to see each other for who you really are. You gain a deeper understanding of your partner’s problems and insecurities. You acknowledge that they have needs, wishes, and insecurities, just like you.
You get better at expressing your needs and desires and you’re more willing to face problems together and work on them. Now, you understand that the real recipe for true love and a meaningful and long-lasting relationship or marriage is mutual understanding, acceptance, and compassion.
Stage 5: Moving forward together.
Now, that both of you have accepted each other’s weaknesses and imperfections along with your strengths and merits, you’ve decided to work together on the relationship, face all difficulties, and stay together forever.
You realize that love is not perfect and it’s never a smooth sailing, but if both of you are headed in the same direction, you’ll always be ready to do your best to keep the love and relationship alive.
What stage of love are you currently in? Feel free to share with us in the comments section below.