Okay, so I am dumping the teabag in the sink and I realize something. Well, first, I realize the teabag is super-hot, but second, I realize we all have a type. The same type of guy.
Now, I am not going to talk about teabags, but I am going to talk about heartbreaks.
Heartbreaks somehow seem to be related to women falling for the same type of guy every damn time. I don’t know why we do it. Like honestly, I don’t know why we keep doing that to ourselves. We tend to be rather stubborn when it comes to choosing our partner, but we have to stop this madness. Eventually.
I mean, we are falling for the wrong guy over and over again, yet hoping that this time things will be different. I know you have promised not to do that to yourself again, but it’s those first dates and he is so loving and sweet, and you start getting your hopes up thinking that he is not like the others.
I know it hurts and I know it’s hard to get away from something that is so promising, but how many heartbreaks are you willing to take on? You are not a soldier having to fight a war, you are a person with emotions, a person who needs love. Love, not mind games and suffering.
It’s complicated to leave a relationship in the past, especially if the relationship lasted for a longer period of time. Change is overwhelming and scary, but it doesn’t mean that it cannot be good or possible.
You have to detach yourself from all the moments you shared together, you have to stop idealizing the time you spent together, and you have to stop entering the same cycle again and again because you already know what is going to happen next.
He is going to start ghosting on you and you are going to wonder whether you are being too panicky, whether you are being too annoying. Maybe he is busy working and you are making a fuss about nothing. But that can happen a few times – he can’t be busy all the time. So, if you notice a pattern happening, you have to do something about it.
Also, dating other people, even though you may not be exclusive yet, is not okay. Him spending more time with his friends rather than with you is not okay. Him being distant, not bothering to ask how your day went or him being emotionally unavailable is, remember, not okay.
So, stop. Stop getting your heart shattered into million pieces and stop crying over a guy that does not deserve you. Strong women are defined not by failures but by how they withstand and cope with those failures.
If you are uncertain about your decision, just make a list of the good and the bad things in your relationship. If the bad overshadows the good, then don’t go any further chasing steam. Don’t go after something you see, but you cannot touch, it’s impalpable.
The players, the heartbreakers, the cheaters, the selfish ones, the narcissists don’t really commit to a relationship. They may be in one, but for the mere satisfaction of manipulating or getting the attention they need in order to thrive.
Do you know what it is you have to do?
Fall out of that type of guy, go out there, enjoy the time you have and exploit your opportunities.
You cannot force love. You cannot force the perfect timing. The good ones come when you least expect them.