I know you are probably exhausted. You wore your heart on your sleeve and you exposed your soul to people who were incapable of handling your deep, intense feelings.
You invested time and every bit of energy inside your being on men who at the end, left you broken and alone. I know your pain.
But, at the same time I know that just like me, you would never ever give up on love. I know that every time you fell down, you did everything to get up and kept moving.
Because you know that love is real, it can happen to anyone. You know that the person for you is somewhere out there, waiting for your paths to cross.
And, I truly believe that the only way you can really feel, and experience genuine love is by first opening your heart and soul to that possibility.
Like the genius, Charles Bukowski once said: “I have my own madness, I live in another dimension and I do not have time for things that have no soul.”
But, how do you put yourself out there and at the same protect your heart from another crash?
Here are 8 ways to make sure it’s safe to finally open your heart when you’re dating:
1. NEVER SETTLE FOR LESS THAN YOU DESERVE
First of all, don’t you ever accept less than you actually need. Whatever you want from life you go and make sure to get it.
Even if it that includes heartbreaks and tears before the Prince on the white horse finally arrives, hold on. Because what’s yours will eventually find you.
2. MAKE SURE THEIR VALUES REGARDING RELATIONSHIPS MATCH YOURS
I know some would say it’s not a good thing, but if you can, try to ask for their past and their previous relationship. Don’t stalk them, just relax and see if they can open up to you. Talk to each other.
You need to see whether they want to be in long-term relationships or this is just another meaningless, little fling.
3. DON’T ACCEPT A RUDE BEHAVIOUR
Especially if you’ve already been through that kind of drama and toxicity in your life. If that painful experience is way behind you, do yourself a favor and don’t you ever make the mistake of engaging in abusive relationships once again.
If you notice a rude and inconsiderate behavior, leave.
4. ACTIONS SPEAK LOUDER THAN WORDS
When you are dating someone, it is essential to let their actions do the talking. They might promise you the world and every star on the night sky, but in the end, it’ll all comes down to their will and determination to fulfill everything they promised.
5. MAKE SURE THEY INCLUDE YOU IN EVERY PART OF THEIR LIFE
Otherwise, when the reality hits you, you’ll be left all alone and disappointed.
If they welcome you in their home or office, introduce you to their family or friends, you are important to them.
If they are very excited to have you in their life and they are proud to show you off to every person in their life, then it’s clear they want to include you in every aspect of their life.
6. MAKE SURE THEY CARE ABOUT YOUR FEELINGS
If the person you’re dating is constantly dismissing your feelings, don’t hesitate to speak up and confront them.
In a healthy, real relationship, you should be able to say anything that bothers you.
7. IF YOU WANT TO WAIT TO HAVE SEX, DO IT (THE RIGHT PERSON WILL WAIT FOR YOU)
Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying you should do it on purpose. It’s just, there are women who aren’t comfortable enough to put everything on the table so soon. And that is perfectly fine.
Sex is a sacred connection between two bodies and souls, so it should happen when both individuals are ready for it.
If your partner has no problem waiting for you to have sex, you’ve found a keeper.
8. EXAMINE YOUR THOUGHTS AND FEELINGS WHEN YOU ARE AROUND THEM
Do you feel happy and excited to see them or you are walking on eggshells around them? If you are cheerful and bubbly around your partner, then great for you, because that’s how it should be.
But, if you experience stress or anxiety the moment they walk into the room, something is wrong in your relationship.
Learn to follow and trust your gut. It is the only thing that will show you the truth, even when your feelings are lying to you.