Toxic people are everywhere around us. They’re like heavy thunderstorms that destroy everything in front of them. Hailstorms that have no mercy.
But, no matter how desperately we might try to ignore them and surround ourselves with genuine, kind-hearted people instead, there are times when it’s truly difficult to just cut them off in a blink of an eye.
Because when the toxic individual in your life is a person who is your family, your blood, your loved one, their detrimental behaviour becomes a huge burden that needs to be taken seriously.
Here are 8 things you can to handle this painful situation and deal with toxic family members once and for all:
1. FIRST THINGS FIRST, LET THEM KNOW THAT THEIR BEHAVIOUR IS HURTFUL
A lot of people make the mistake of ignoring the toxicity of a family member like it’s nothing, thinking that the less they mention the problem, the bigger the odds that the person’s madness will stop.
When in reality, pretending everything is fine will only give them a green light to continue doing what they’re doing.
Ignorance might be a bliss today. In the long run, it will cost you your life.
Stop tolerating their insufferable behaviour and face them head on!
2. GIVE THEM A CHANCE TO CHANGE
Once you make thing clear and explain how hurtful their behaviour is, give them space and time to work on themselves and eventually change.
It won’t be easy, but it is essential to be there for them and do everything in your power to help them make the initial step and start the healing process.
3. DON’T TAKE THEIR BEHAVIOUR PERSONALLY
Keep in mind that their hurtful behaviour is something that goes on inside their head and it has nothing to do with you.
Try to not let it get to you, no matter how desperately they try to blame you for everything. Once you take it personally, you admit that you’re guilty and automatically fall into their trap.
If they see they can get away with this once, they will never stop.
4. STAND UP FOR YOURSELF AND DEFEND YOUR RIGHTS
However, if the toxicity increases and the person doesn’t bother to change something about them, don’t be afraid to stand up for yourself and fight for your rights.
You are a person made of flesh, a beating heart, and genuine emotions. You have limited time on this earth and you won’t allow it to be wasted on a toxic relationship, even if it’s a family member.
5. THEY MIGHT NOT BE BAD PEOPLE, BUT IT’S BEST TO KEEP A SAFE DISTANCE FROM THEM
In some cases, the detrimental, toxic behaviour is a manifestation of a much deep-rooted problem. They probably mean well and care about you, but they have a terrible way of handling life and expressing their emotions.
However, even if they aren’t bad people, you shouldn’t put their needs and desires before yours. Compromising your health and happiness for a mentally and emotionally unstable person who keeps choosing to behave toxic in spite of your good intentions is just not worth it.
6. FORGIVE THEM FOR THEIR MISTAKES
Do it for yourself. Forgive them for their mistakes instead of hating their guts and wasting your time plotting revenge.
But, never forget. Put all the drama aside, but remain cautious and very careful in their presence.
It’s more than likely that a person of this kind will never stop.
7. USE YOUR TIME WISELY AND FOCUS ON YOUR WELL BEING
Toxic family members are people who can’t be avoided and abandoned easily. They are right there beside us. They’ve either raised us, spend a lifetime with us, or made us feel things we’ve never felt before.
So, the decision to cut them off and go on without them is a truly difficult and painful process because as much as they hurt you, you still find it hard to hate them.
However, when a change needs to be done, it needs to be done. You have to start focusing on yourself and realize that if you don’t do it, they certainly won’t.
8. IF IT FEELS LIKE THERE’S NO USE IN FIGHTING FOR THEM, JUST LET GO
But, if you feel like you’ve done everything to help them and only hurt yourself in the process, the best thing is to just walk away.
In the end, only you know what’s best for you. And if letting go is a way of healing yourself, then you should definitely do it!