Just recently, I told my friend that I bought a cinema ticket for a movie I’ve waited a whole year to watch. She looked at me as if I told her that I had killed a puppy. The first sentence that came out of her mouth was, “You are going alone? Why didn’t you call to ask me to come with you?”
Apparently, for a reason. I needed to spend some time on my own.
And so, I did. Yesterday I went out and treated myself to a solo date at the cinema. The movie was amazing, it was even better than I had expected. Plus, the experience of watching a long-awaited movie on my own was truly liberating. So, I decided that after the movie I was going to treat myself to a light dinner and a glass of wine in my favorite seafood restaurant.
But, as soon as I sat down, everyone started looking at me strangely. I could almost feel their judgmental look on their faces. They were pitying me. I could see it in their eyes that they were feeling sorry for me because I didn’t have a partner or a friend beside me. On top of it all, the waiters kept asking me if I am waiting for someone or not.
Regardless of their weird reactions, I spent my night out just fine, but that night forced me to think about certain things that troubled my mind for quite a long time.
Why is spending time alone so scary? Why are you making such a big deal out of it?
Most importantly, why are people who enjoy doing things on their own considered weird and lonely?
Spending time alone is probably the best thing that you can do to yourself. It is an opportunity to calm down, relax, detach from this chaos of a world and reflect on yourself.
Once you find the time to dive deep inside that soul of yours you will be able to hear it calling for you. You will finally have the time to listen to your thoughts, analyze where your journey is taking you and change everything that needs to be changed.
Why does this sound like a nightmare to you?
Going out solo doesn’t mean that you are lonely, nor does it mean that you have no friends. It just means that you are not in the mood to entertain someone and you’d rather spend your time doing something on your own. Whether that is going to the cinema and drinks after the movie or sitting in your favorite brunch place and reading a book, it’s your choice.
So, I am sorry, but I am not sorry that my dining alone makes you feel uncomfortable. It shouldn’t. YES, I like doing things on my own and NO, I am not a weirdo for loving that. What you do or say will never discourage me from enjoying the beauty of this life on my own.
Because, honestly, spending time alone nourishes my soul. It is the key to self-growth. It slows me down in a good way and lets me function at my own pace. It gives me the chance to detach myself from this world’s troubles and think about things that make my heart flutter and eyes sparkle. It helps me focus on myself and take things slowly.
Don’t be afraid to do it if that is what you need indeed. Go for a hike on your own if you don’t feel like socializing with other people. Buy those tickets and don’t hesitate to travel alone to your favorite destination. Go see your favorite singer live, even if your friends don’t like his music. Enjoy your first coffee alone. Treat yourself to a nice lunch after work.
Don’t miss out on the things you want to do just because you are afraid what other people might say about you.
If you want to do something, do it. After all, you are the only person that can make yourself happy. And you, my darling, are more than enough.
So, go ahead. Give your soul whatever it needs.
You will thank yourself for it.
