I am at a point of my life where all my girlfriends are either married or in long-term serious relationships. I am neither married nor I am in a relationship. My friends all keep telling me how sometimes they are jealous of my life and the freedom I have and sometimes I believe them because I am happy with my life.
However, there are the other times when I start feeling a little behind with my life and that I must have taken a wrong turn somewhere to be stuck in this rut. But the truth is, I AM NOT. I was in a long-term relationship that has given me nothing but pain and toxicity. I was hurt and depressed, but I became so comfortable in my own pain that I didn’t even notice how deep I have gone. That person was the one with whom I planned on getting married and having kids. I planned to spend the rest of my life with him.
And thank God I didn’t. Thank God I got out of that relationship and survived.
And since then, I have been enjoying every little thing that life has to offer. I am happy and fulfilled. I am doing things I love without having someone constantly beating my spirit down. That’s why I don’t have any regrets for breaking up with you. In fact, I am grateful for being the asshole you were and showed me your true colors before making the biggest mistake of my life.
I am grateful for never moving in with him, never marrying him, and never having his children. I may have lost many years with him, but at least now I know what I want from a relationship.
So, this goes to my ex: Thank you for being my worst and at the same time my best decision I have ever made in my life. I am forever grateful for treating me like I was disposable and taking me for granted so that I can appreciate the one who will treat me right.
Thank you for making me realize my worth. I am so grateful to you making me realize that true love doesn’t make someone feel small and unworthy like you were making me feel. I want to thank you for opening my eyes and pushing me towards living the best life without you in it.
But most importantly, thank you for letting me go.