I don’t get it.
As much I want to get inside your head and understand your reasons, I just can’t.
You are someone who is truly different, yet you’re desperately trying to fit into the same mold just like everyone else. A wildflower in a field of roses. You want to be the perfect, textbook example of a woman. You want to avoid making mistakes at all cost and show him that you are the right one for him.
You want him to notice you. To like you. To fall in love with you. To be with you.
But all the while, you forget one important thing.
You forget that you are already perfect.
Perfect in your imperfection. Perfect in your individuality. Perfect in your flawlessness. Perfect exactly as you are.
Regardless of the fact that many can’t see part of you.
You forget all that you are in order to become something that you believe he might like. And you don’t notice it yet, but you are changing. You are erasing your identity for something that you call “ love”. You are giving up on things that make you whole for someone else. What’s pains me the most is that you no longer care how you see yourself. The only thing that you are interested in is the way you look in his eyes.
You are being consumed by this foolish idea that pretending to be someone you are not will make him fall for you and love you for the rest of your lives.
Well, bad news dear…
Life doesn’t work that way.
LOVE doesn’t work that way.
Don’t let him or anyone else fool you into thinking otherwise.
You shouldn’t have to give up on yourself in order to be liked. Much less change your entire value system. Because no matter how much you try to change yourself in order to make people love you, you will never receive the love that you crave until you learn to accept and appreciate your true self.
This is the only mantra that you need in your life.
If you can’t accept and love yourself for who you are, you are never going to attract someone who will truly love you. You’ll only get stuck in an infinite vicious cycle that will ultimately destroy you and your whole world.
For every person that comes into your life will love the image that you’ve created for the whole world to see, not the one that you keep safe within you.
So, stop trying to be what he wants you to be and just be YOURSELF.
Flawed. Awkward. Weird. Anxious. Reserved. Confused. Shy. Different.
Whatever YOU are. Whatever YOU want to be.
After all, you only have yourself. Make sure that relationship lasts forever.